Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch

2008-03-08T20:45:00.000-08:00

2008-02-18T23:47:00.000-08:00

You know its true what they say about Mondays...They really do suck.

I know that it is a bad attitude to have, but I really dislike when my entire weekends are taken up by writing a stupid paper on some boring love story like "Sense and Sensibility" and then I have to go right back to school. Arrrgh! (Side note: I often don't like using onomatopoeia or exclaimations, but I just feel so upset!). The one bright spot is that Emma and I are still hanging out together despite Beth's efforts to turn her against me. Bitch! (Again...read above) I am so upset at Beth and can't believe how much she has changed since our Red Hill school days a couple years ago. We were at one time best friends and now that has completely changed. Tom, my other old friend from Red Hill has also turned on me, although that happened quite awhile ago. He is even playing football and is dating a cheerleader named Becky Feist. A cheerleader! He and Beth are now friends, which is unbelievable because Beth and I used to mock cheerleaders and 'deride' them for how fake they are. Deride is the word of the week, but more on that later.

One good thing to come from these 'shocking' turn of events is that I feel like writing again. Maybe its my new found fondness for Emma Osterman, but I feel more inspired than I have in quite some time. My therapist, Mr. Todd, has traced my previous lack of inspiration back to about one and a half years ago when my Grandfather, Jem Big Sky the first, passed away. He says that perhaps I wrote "as a means of connecting with him and his past" and that when he died I lost that connection. I think that he may be right because every time I have tried to write since, I start to feel loss and emptiness. He has helped me to express these feelings and as a result has separated my desire to write from those painful memories. Now, I focus on the strength I get from expressing myself and from creating thoughts, both fictional and non-fictional, that help me to "create my story", as Mr. Todd puts it.

Well, I wish I had more to write this week, other than to say that life is funny and people are funnier. I have trouble accepting change sometimes (like with my former friendships), but am glad to accept the positive change in the addition of Emma in my life. It scares me because I feel more and more that she is the reason I can get myself out of bed in the morning. Dad says that maybe that isn't so healthy, but almost always when you like someone, that for the first several days of that 'fresh' relationship, you can't think of much else but seeing that person again. He also said that "one must be careful (meaning me), not to be the only one in the relationship who feels that way". Of course it was natural for me to respond as if this were a question about Emma's feelings for me, in which I stated that I was almost positive that she feels the same way and that she has been about as lost as me at this 'monstrosity' of a school called Ronald Reagan High School since she came here. Also, we both feel like we have found each other for a reason. "What exactly is the reason?", he asked politely. I responded with "to help each other through the day". Apparently, that wasn't good enough for Jem Big Sky II and he said "what else you got?" I couldn't say anything at that point, but after thinking about it for awhile, I have realized that I just like talking to her about a lot of different things. She tells me stories about Arcata and I tell her stories about Red Hill. We talk about why we liked our schools so much better than RRHS and in what ways. We are both reminded by our Mothers that "the grass is always greener on the other side", but after real careful consideration, it isn't really that in our case. We both felt like learning was more fun and active at our other schools and less out of a book. We took more trips and learned 'hands on' as they say. I never felt dreadful about the idea of going to school, unless maybe if I had a Math test, although often Math problems were involved in projects like 'starting a business' or 'planning a trip'. I guess I could go on, but I think my readers get the picture.

Both my parents and Emma's mother have encouraged us (or maybe challenged us) to write letters to the school board and perhaps our principal with these thoughts about how best we learn in the hopes that maybe things will change. Both Emma and I think that it couldn't hurt, but sometimes it does give us something to "complain" about as Dad says and maybe we need that "bond of oppression" to make us feel isolated from everyone else. I guess he has a point, but I think we are not alone in how we feel about our current school and that we maybe shouldn't isolate ourselves like we have. Damnit! I hate it when my Dad is right. He is right often and that is why I come to him for advice I suppose.

Perhaps Emma and I could start a club at school that takes action against boring school work. Emma said that it could be called "More than the facts" club. I asked why and she said that maybe learning should be about more than just facts in a book and should be about "going places". I said "and doing real things". "Yes!" she said excitedly, and we could petition the school to spend more money on field trips and encourage the teachers to push for it too. We spent the entire lunch period writing down ideas and nearly forgot to eat our lunches. I think that we will have to start recruiting members or start a petition soon in order to get attention to the cause. "I think there may be enough students who aren't brainwashed completely" Emma said. "Yeah and perhaps we could convince them to put their cellphones down long enough to sign a petition", I replied. We both laughed and then had a nervous few moments looking at one another that made me feel a little queasy inside.

I think I am beginning to like that feeling.

Its 2-for-1 with word or words of the week. Deride means "express contempt for; ridicule" and the meaning of monstrosity is "something, esp. a building, that is very large and is considered unsightly" or "something that is outrageously or offensively wrong". I think both definitions of monstrosity work fine in this case.

2008-02-10T22:15:00.000-08:00

Well, a couple of months have passed once again since I have written. For some reason, I have not had the desire to write about myself or my family in quite some time. Maybe its because I have to write all the time at school and a lot of time about things that don't interest me. I also spend a lot of time trying to remember figures like dates about historical events that have some interest to me, but I cannot seem to remember when exactly they happened because numbers don't seem to stick in my head for some reason. I definitely don't like writing book reports on books by people like Shakespeare or Jane Austen. I guess I would rather write about current events or fictional stories about precoscious cats or dogs. Unfortunately, I will not be able to take Creative Writing until next year and only if it does not fill up before I can sign up.

So, I keep a writing journal by my bed that I write in once in awhile, but not often at once to transfer to my blog. I do have a story that I feel needs to be written about and that is why I am finally entering a long, overdue posting. It does involve my friend, Beth, and the Sweethearts Ball that happened two days ago.
I asked Beth to go to the dance a couple of weeks ago and she said 'yes' and then a junior named Dylan asked her a few days later and for some reason she said 'yes' to him also. I think she was surprised by his request and somehow forgot about me asking her. I don't know exactly why she did it, but I think she has secretly liked him for awhile. Well, anyhow it really hurt when she finally remembered that she agreed to go with me and then apologized. She seemed to be really embarrassed by it, but I decided to forgive her and I think she sensed that I hadn't really.
I wasn't going to go at all mow even though I had bought tickets, but I heard my Grandpa's voice tell me to "get back on the horse, son". So, I decided to go by myself. I felt so alone and I thought that my time at Ronald Reagan High School had sunk to a new low. The only person I felt close to and could trust was Beth and now I felt so 'isolated' and depressed. 'Isolation' then has become my word of the, well, month. Just when I was about to call my dad from the payphone, a girl named Emma came up to me and started talking to me with just a little hint of hesitation; almost as if she was being encouraged by a distant voice like I was. She said "Hi. I'm Emma". "I'm Jem", I replied. At first, I sounded a bit confused and maybe as though someone like her was only coming up to me because of pity. I was also allowing some of my anger of the evening come through and I think Emma sensed this and said "Are you ok?" I said, with some hint of annoyance and sarcasm, "yes, I am great. How are you?" She stopped her answer and seemed ready to bolt at any moment, but the funniest thing happened; she didn't. She got this funny look on her face and as though she was sizing me up, processing what I had said, and thinking of her reply all at once. I don't know if I can remember feeling that uncomfortable, yet somehow free to be more than just a 'nice guy' for once. All of the uncomfortableness in the silence melted away when she finally said "Do you want to go for a walk Jem?" I was speechless. "Um...yeah, sure. I would like to do that"...not exactly a great line from a romance novel, but it made her smile.
So, Even though my first reaction to Emma was filled with distrust, self-pity, and a little bit of shame, she somehow saw through that. It was as if she knew exactly how I was feeling and exactly what had happened to me this week. Perhaps, even though we don't share any classes together and have never met, she somehow knew who I was. Well, I didn't ask her if she knew Beth or what our relationship is like, but it seemed like for an instant as we were leaving the multi-purpose space (MPS) that she shot a nasty look at someone. I glanced only once in her direction as we were headingout and tried not to look at anything else but the floor. I had decided that I didn't want to even know if she was somehow playinga joke on me or perhaps was sent by someone else to "tease the lonely kid" or "run salt in the loser's wounds". That was what was running through my mind as Emma and I departed the MPS and started heading toward the Arts wing. We walked almost the whole way down the corridor while she told me about how she moved here from Northern California at the beginning of the semester and how small the school was that she went to and how much she misses it. She also said that her only friend, Jordan, talked her into coming to the dance and how much she dislikes dances, but thought she could meet people, but that everyone seemed to know each other already and that she couldn't get "a word in edgewise" (not sure exactly the meaning there) and how she was really wishing she were back at her old town (Arcata) where right now she would be riding her bike to the beach and wishing she wasn't so alone, when she looked over and saw me. She said "you looked like the only person here more miserable than me", so she decided to meet me even though she was nervous. We stopped at a glass case at the very end of the hall by the art room and she pointed toward a painting of a beautiful, misty beach scene, but didn't say anything about it. I looked and saw her name on a small piece of paper next to it: "Emma Lynn Osterman" and it was simply entitled "Home". I looked at her and said "I like it, it rhymes. Um, your name, I mean". once I stopped studdering a little more about her name, I finally spit out "Your home is really nice". She smiled and then told me about how she drew it from a photograph that she took the day before she left. "Why did you come here?", I asked. She explained that her Step-dad's Dad was really sick and the family decided to move to take care of him. She said that also her real or biological Dad has had trouble finding work and thought a change would be good, so her moved her also with his girlfriend. "What does your Dad do?", I said. "He used to be in construction, but lately he has been making sculptures and a lot of times he has meetings with people about saving trees". This made me perk up even more and I told her that my Dad is trying to save our local rivers and lakes from being bought and drained by the "fat cats". "Well, our Dad's should meet", Emma said and I agreed.
We just walked around the school talking until Principal Preston told us to go back to the dance. I asked her if she wanted to dance and she said "I would love to sometime", just as she noticed a white pickup truck pull up in front of the circle. She gave me one of the best hugs I can ever remember receiving and off she went. She was almost out of sight when she ran back from the truck, which made my heart race even more, and said "Do you need a ride?" "My Dad will be here soon" I said and she ran off again and disappeared into the truck which drove off. I didn't even notice that someone was calling my name from the entry to the MPS. It could have been the music or the thumping of my heart, but the words "Hey Big Sky!" finally broke through. "Hi Beth", I said calmly, "Are you having a fun evening?" "Where have you been all night? I have been looking for you", Beth said. "Oh...I have been seeing the school in a whole different light, Beth", I answered.
"Isolation" means: "far away from other places, buildings, or people; remote" or "having minimal contact or little in common with others". An example of its usage is "The mysterious girl delightfully interrupted my utter isolation".

Isolated Mountain Goat painting by "Nick's Pocket Paintings" myspace site.

2007-12-14T08:56:00.000-08:00

Somehow three months have passed again without me updating everyone....

I have gotten a laptop from my parents for my birthday, which was on Dec. 1st, and am in Creative Writing class right now at Ronald Reagan High School typing on it. My small school on Red Hill would have been on break by now and it seems strange to still be in school for another week before Winter break.
So far, my first semester of high school has been really strange and often lonely and uncomfortable. Freshmen are treated badly in most schools, according to Dad, and I just will have to "tough it out". Tom and I hardly speak with one another because he has friends already from being in the district last year for 8th grade and they have convinced him that our small school on Red Hill was for sissies or "hippies" as they call them. I can't even defend that because I am not sure why they would even think that. Mom says that they are just jealous because they had to go to a big school for junior high and only wish that they had gone to a small school that is more "open". I asked her what that meant and she said that I was more "open" to explore things that I liked at the small school and more "open" to be myself overall. I guess I understand now and it just made me wish for that experience again. Mom said that if their was a better option that was "feasible" then her and Dad would send me there, but right now there just isn't unless they want to drive me an hour and a half away, which would be a lot of driving for them everyday.
Some of my fellow students from the Red Hill School are going to that school far away, but they live much closer than I do. Fortunately, a few friends of mine from Red Hill are going to Ronald Reagan High, but some are also being home-schooled. My best friend right now is Beth, who was good friends with Gretchen when she was at Red Hill. Gretchen and I have stopped writing each other and I think Gretchen and her Mom have moved again, so I have lost touch with her almost completely. I feel really sad when I think about it and wish sometimes that somehow she would just show up at my doorstep at the ranch. That seems pretty unlikely though and "its best to move on", Dad says. Beth has not heard from Gretchen either and has moved on quite awhile ago. I wish it were that easy for me, but I guess I was closer to Gretchen than Beth was.
Beth has been growing a lot and looks much different than she did last year at Red Hill. I sometimes feel like the shortest person in the school, even though I know that I am not. Beth and I have been watching a lot of movies lately at my house and often we end up holding hands during the movie. It doesn't quite feel as exciting as it did with Gretchen, but being around Beth makes me feel good. She doesn't make me feel nervous all the time, like when Gretchen and I would hang out alone together. She is my good friend that has never said anything to hurt me or make me mad. Except for that time when she said that I was whining too much about our new school right after she just got done complaining about the cheerleaders. I think she was having a bad day because her cat, Jonas, was missing for three days and she was a little worried. Jonas came back later that day after she got home from school and left an open can of tuna at the back stairs. I have told Beth that Jonas was my inspiration for my short story "JoJo and Brooks" because he is always getting out and rarely comes back clean or smelling like honeysuckle. My Mom calls that cat (and Brooks) "mischievous", which means "causing or showing a fondness for causing trouble in a playful way". I guess I knew most of what that meant, but I didn't realize it was also "playful". I guess there are quite a few kids in my new school that are mischievous and sometimes it seems to be a game for some kids. According to what I read in Grandpa's letters and notes that I read last year, that he was quite a mischievous teenager and often got into trouble. I think I might be ready to share one of those stories soon, but for now I must get to my next class...math. ;(
(I can't believe I just used one of those internet sad faces that give you a neck ache).
Till next time,
The Boy (15 yrs, 2 weeks)

Painting by Pablo Picasso

2007-09-09T14:05:00.000-07:00

Hello to my few readers that I still have left. I guess mostly I realized that I was writing this blog for myself anyhow, so I have been handwriting more in my journal instead. That was until a man named Rufus in Little Rock, Arkansas emailed me to ask why I stopped writing in my blog Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch. I tried to explain it to him in an email back and he replied that there are at least a few people that look forward to reading it every week or so and that I should continue just for their sake. I said that I have trouble telling the absolute honest truth if I know people will read it and maybe judge me for what I am thinking and feeling. His last email said that it is always risky opening up your self and revealing your darkest fears, but maybe it will inspire others to do so and then we might all feel a little closer as people. I guess I didn't realize that and maybe took for granite that people don't care that much and maybe are too worried about there own lives to care about my problems. I also thought that maybe it doesn't always need to be about me and I can just go back to telling stories about my late Grandfather and the rest of my family and keep researching until I have a more complete picture of my family's past and current history. Thanks Rufus for helping me to see things differently.

For the past 6 months, I have had some more change in my life. My school was shut down at the end of July and I have just completed my first week at the big school in town, Ronald Reagan High School. It was a difficult first week, but before I talk about that, I want to mention that my Grandma Sylvia is still battling lung cancer and my Mom says that she may not make it to Christmas. I went to visit her in Minnesota last month before I started school and she looked really weakened by the cancer. Mom says that Grandma has always been filled with such creative spirit and that it seems as though that spirit is slowly being drained from her. Mom says that seeing me last month helped her spirit and she noticed an improvement during the week I was there, which made me feel sad that I had to leave, but Mom said that Grandma Sylvia is always 'buoyed' by visiting family and that I should feel good that I made her feel better. I do feel better, but wish there was something more I could do. "We are not medicine men", said Dad, "and even they can only do so much". I guess he is right, but maybe we all have hidden abilities to heal ourselves (and others) that we cannot see. I called Cousin Bruce, the yoga teacher, about this and he said, "That is certainly true and we must learn from and build on what others have already learned". "Like who?" I asked and he replied "Eastern doctors from Asian countries and even some here". "I am tired of feeling like I cannot do anything to help the sick people I love", I said and Bruce seemed to really appreciate hearing this and said after a long pause "Me too, buddy, and the best thing we can do is try to help people live healthier lives to prevent them from getting sick. You can help your Mom and Dad by helping to make their lives less stressful and by helping them to eat better". We then talked about their diet and how bad meat can be for people these days and things like that. I mentioned that I tried not eating meat for a whole day and it was really hard. "I know, Jem", he said, "it is hard to change our everyday habits".
This leads me back to my new school and how everyday at my other school, I was used to certain things that don't happen anymore now. I was used to meeting with my writing teacher and advisor, Mr. Grady, before classes started and talking about current events of the school and things we might cover for the next edition of the paper. I miss going out ontop of the hill during lunch to look at the pastures in the lower valley. I miss having class outside in the sunlight and reading under the big aspen tree during free study time. I miss not being picked on by upperclassman who are trying to impress their girlfriends. Most of all, I miss everyone knowing who I am and being happy to see me. At RRHS, people just look down at me or just ignore me like I don't exist... I am not sure which is worse. I really miss my school.
Dad says that it will take time to get to know people and to find my 'niche'. I thought he said my itch which made no sense, but he had to spell 'niche' for me which means: "a comfortable or suitable position in life or employment." He is now a partner at a leading law firm and feels he has found his niche. By the way, 'buoyed' means: "cause to become cheerful or confident." The party was buoyed by an election victory.
So, tomorrow I start my second week of public school and I have decided to write about the experience on this blog and to help me bridge the gap between the two very different places and the two very different experiences. Maybe in the end this blog might make a good case for them to re-open my school or one just like it.
jem

Painting by Diane Weintraub

2007-03-24T23:31:00.000-07:00

Happy Spring!

I apologize for not posting in a while but I have been writing letters lately instead. Mostly, I have been writing letters to Gretchen, but more and more she has been taking longer to respond. She doesn't have a computer at home so it is hard to email her.
So, it has been a very fast winter and many things are changing, as usual. Our school is shutting down at the end of the summer trimester. Some kids have already left to go to the school in town. I will also probably start high school in town next year, which makes me sad and upset. Also, with Tom not being at school, it has been hard to find a good friend. I do have some friends, but no one like him. I have a friend who moved here from Germany named Jurgen. Some of Gretchen's old friends, like Beth, are also my good friends. One good thing about going to school in town next year is being able to be in classes with Tom again. Although, now that he has been in a bigger school, he has met more people and we don't get together as often.
My ancestor project is finished and as soon as I get the project back, I am going to post it somehow on my blog, although it is a very big file.

I have learned a lot this year, especially about loss and about death. Sometimes in life bad things happen all at once or one after another and there isn't anything you can do about it. We just found out yesterday that Grandma Sylvia has cancer in her lungs and may need surgery. Mom has been upset all day and she will be flying to Minnesota tomorrow. "It has just been a bad year" said Dad. I asked him if Grandma Sylvia smoked and Mom said that she had a little bit when she was younger, but that she quit during the early 70's. I had an appointment with my counselor, Mr. Todd, this morning and he told me to express how I feel about Grandma Sylvia getting sick and I realized that I felt angry. I said that I didn't know why and he said that maybe I was just upset because of all the change and that people get angry when loved ones are in pain. I said that I wasn't angry about Grandpa dying until weeks after and Mr. Todd said that it was probably because it was a new experience and that it took me awhile to feel all of the other feelings before anger. "And I am skipping those other feelings this time?" I asked. "Yes" said Mr. Todd "and now you know what the end result might be and people often get angry when they have run out of the other feelings." "Like sadness?", I said. "Yes. Sometimes when you have had one traumatic experience after another, one tends to skip right to anger because it is often out of frustration and from being fatigued of being sad" replied Mr. Todd. "I see", I said. I told him that I am angry because Mom is upset and that she already feels bad because she is so far away from Grandma. "And you already saw how your Grandpa's death affected your Dad". I nodded and then stopped to ask him what "trauma" means and he told me. "Trauma" is "a deeply distressing or disturbing experience". I decide to list all of the synonyms because most of the words have been used by someone in my family at one time or another this year.
(shock, upheaval, distress, stress, strain, pain, anguish, suffering, upset, agony, misery, sorrow, grief, heartache, heartbreak, torture; ordeal, trial, tribulation, trouble, worry, anxiety; nightmare, hell, hellishness)
Now I understand that if one were surrounded by these words time after time that they would eventually feel angry rather than sad. But now it is Spring and Spring is the season of new hope. I hope that my school somehow stays open. I hope that my trip to Catalina Island next week will bring us all great joy (and that we see some dolphins). I hope that Grandma Sylvia gets better and that her medicine works well. I hope that Mom feels better and that she finds some moments to enjoy seeing her family despite the tough time. I hope that I feel less angry about life and death and the pain that it causes loved ones. I hope to never lose hope.

Picture by Alicia Ruhl and Jason Marrano

2007-02-10T09:53:00.000-08:00

Jo Jo and Brooks

by Jem Big Sky III

Part Three
Dave and Jo Jo waited outside the bakery for nearly 10 minutes while the firefighters arrived. Jo Jo grabbed one of them by the sleeve and said "My cat is inside!" "Where? What! A cat?" said the firefighter. "He follows me to work and when the alarm...he is in an air vent!" Jo Jo said quickly. "Alright" the firefighter replied and then ran towards the bakery.
Several minutes went by and it appeared the fire was nothing more than smoke. The firefighters were starting to come out of the bakery one at a time and it seemed some of them weren't even dirty. None of them had Brooks in their arms and they were starting to take off their masks. Jo Jo asked each of them if they had seen a cat and one of them, a rather large man, replied, "A cat? No we didn't see no cat." Jo Jo started to make his way back inside the bakery when he was stopped by what looked like the oldest firefighter and was told that he couldn't go back inside yet. "Are you the guy who lost his cat inside?", asked the older firefighter. "Yes" said Jo Jo as he tried to explain how it had happened. The man, who turned out to be the firefighter captain, told Jo Jo that they would be checking all parts of the building to assess the damage and that they would look out for Brooks. The firefighter then wanted to know who was working in the oven room when the fire started and Jo Jo just shrugged and was clearly distracted by what the other firefighters were doing inside the bakery. "I am sorry, but I was on a break when the alarm went off", said Jo Jo finally.
Jo Jo joined Dave on the curb outside and while Jo Jo continued to worry, up walked another co-worker, named Harry, who started talking about the fire and how it started and that it was no one's fault and so forth. Dave and Harry kept talking while Jo Jo was looking at the smoldering building. He wondered about a lot of things, about his previous pet, a dog named Simon, who was killed by a car. He wondered if maybe he wasn't a very good pet owner and shouldn't be in charge of another living thing, which ironically is what his father told him after all his goldfish died one summer day. After that, his father wouldn't allow any more pets because of Jo Jo's knack for losing or killing them on accident. Jo Jo would find stray pets and bring them in the house to hide from his father, but usually they would soon stray again. Sometimes, Jo Jo would find frogs, but would forget to put the lid on the jar and they would jump out. One ended up in his father's cereal by accident and Jo Jo was instantly blamed for the incident.
Jo Jo's mind was wandering some more when Harry asked him "Did you leave any valuables in the bakery?" Just as Jo Jo was about to tell Harry, the bakery's biggest gossip, about Brooks, Jo Jo looked in the tree on the side of the parking lot and saw what he thought was a squirrel and continued telling Harry about how his cat followed him to work and ended up running into a vent. "Your cat?" asked Harry, in almost a mocking tone. "Yes" said Jo Jo, when suddenly there seemed to be a commotion in the same tree and a couple of birds took flight when all of a sudden a cat jumped out of the tree in a leap towards the flying birds, but ended up landing on the grass empty handed. "Its Brooks!" shouted Dave.

Painting by Eileen Mosca

2007-01-10T20:52:00.000-08:00

Jo Jo and Brooks
by Jem Big Sky III

Part Two
Nobody noticed a frightened, but excited Brooks peeking through the opening of the red cooler and Jo Jo put the cooler under the bench where he usually set aside his lunch. Luckily for Jo Jo, Brooks had a barely loud enough to hear squeak for a meow and only occasionally heard a faint noise coming from his red cooler. The receptionist, Donna, walked by Jo Jo’s cooler right before going to the restroom and thought she heard a squeak, but just thought it was her new shoes and kept walking. During lunch, Jo Jo fed pieces of turkey through the opening of the cooler for Brooks and took him outside to the back of the bakery, near the railroad tracks to let him go to the bathroom. At first Brooks was frightened by his unfamiliar surroundings, but he decided to stick his head out, then his neck, front legs, and finally his backside. He roamed around the place where empty bread trays are placed and eventually found enough soft dirt to dig into. Jo Jo looked at the large puffy clouds in the sky and thought about his mother who lived far away and about his brother Theodore who moved back to Europe to “find his roots”. He thought many things and then looked at some of his co-workers through a window and realized that they were all going back to work, so he thought that he’d better go too. So, Jo Jo grabbed Brooks and put him into the cooler and went back to finish preparing the trays for the next batch of muffins.
Jo Jo found it surprising that Brooks would be as comfortable as he was with his new “home”, but thought maybe Brooks would jump out and break a health code violation or two, but he didn’t and even fell asleep right before it was time for Jo Jo to go home.
On the way home, Brooks pushed open the lid a little more and peeked his head out just enough that Jo Jo’s neighbor, Cindy, saw Brooks and shouted “What’s your cat doing in there?” “this is my new cat carrier”, said Jo Jo as he just giggled quietly to himself.
The next morning, Jo Jo made sure he left Brooks inside the house, but somehow, as he usually does, Brooks found a way out and followed Jo Jo to work again. Jo Jo just could not believe it and still doesn’t know how Brooks gets out. He has checked every window and has even locked the bathroom door in case he found a way out through the air vent. Jo Jo emptied out the cooler once again, placed his pastrami sandwich in his coat pocket and put Brooks in the cooler. Brooks was now able to keep the lid open with one of his paws and by poking his head out just enough.
It wasn’t long before someone at the bakery noticed Brooks and Jo Jo’s friend, Dave almost choked on his raisin clump when he noticed him on his lunch break. He said that Mrs. Beckley better not see Brooks or Jo Jo will get in trouble. Jo Jo told Dave about his problem and Dave responded with “Brooks just doesn’t like staying home, does he?” “No” said Jo Jo, “When he was a kitten, he got stuck in a hole in the screen door while trying to get out”. “Have you checked to see that all the screens are fastened tightly on the windows?”, asked Dave. “Well, not really, but I haven’t seen any open when I am at home.” Dave and Jo Jo both just shrugged their shoulders and then, without warning, the fire alarm went off really loudly, which startled Dave, Jo Jo and especially Brooks, who jumped out of the cooler and ran down the hallway of the break room towards Mrs. Beckley’s office. Jo Jo got up quickly like a father whose child has run into the street. “Brooks!” said Jo Jo, as if it were possible to yell and whisper at the same time. Brooks darted through an opening in an air vent and ran inside. Just as Brooks was out of sight, Mrs. Beckley came out of her office shouting “Everyone get outside through the emergency exit door!” and just then both Dave and Jo Jo, who were trying to gather Brooks, were told by the security guard, Mr. Rosewood, t turn around because the exit is the other way. “But…” started Jo Jo, when Dave grabbed his arm and started him going towards the exit. It was obvious to both of them that this was not a drill because there was a strong smell of smoke coming from the oven room. “But Dave…” shouted Jo Jo. “I know…” said Dave, “Brooks is still inside!” yelled Jo Jo, as the two made their way outside. “Hopefully, Brooks’ knack for getting outside will save him”, said Dave. “I hope so.” Replied Jo Jo in a weeping voice.

2007-01-02T20:49:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year 2007!!!
Here is a story I have been writing during winter break:

Jo Jo and Brooks
by Jem Big Sky III

Part One
Once there was a man named Jo Jo who had a cat named, Brooks. Jo Jo, or Johannes Johannson, which was the name he was born with, often liked to take walks around his neighborhood. One dayhe realized as he turned around that his cat, Brooks, was following him down the street. He picked up Brooks and brought him back to his house, while Brooks voiced his unhappiness at being picked up. This routine went on for a couple of weeks until finally Brooks stopped following Jo Jo and Jo Jo almost wished when he turned around that he would see Brooks. He got used to seeing his cat following him and it had become part of his daily routine.
Jo Jo worked at the bakery where the local bread was made and had to get up early to go to work. When it became winter, he would be walking to work in the dark, when one day he got to work and realized as the sun was coming up, that his cat, Brooks, had followed him and he had not noticed it. Jo Jo became nervous because he didn’t have time to walk Brooks all the way home. So, he thought quickly about what to do. He thought about hiding him in a closet at work, but worried that someone would find him, like the janitor, and would chase Brooks away.
Jo Jo picked up Brooks and started to walk towards the bakery when he suddenly had an idea. He put his small red lunch cooler down and emptied out his turkey sandwich and the bag of ice, along with the package of peanut butter cookies that had been given by his neighbor, Cindy. He put his cat in the cooler and closed the lid. He then realized that Brooks would not be able to breath if he kept him in there. So Jo Jo took out his pocket knife and after pulling out a confused Brooks from the cooler, he started poking holes through the lid with the knife. He began to realize that he was ruining his only lunch cooler so he quickly stopped.
Jo Jo thought maybe the two holes would be enough if he left the lid partially open also. Suddenly, he looked at his watch and realized that he had three minutes to go another block and a half to work, so he put Brooks in the partially-opened cooler, put his lunch in his jacket pocket and jogged his way to the Bakery.

2006-11-15T19:39:00.000-08:00

Hello to the whole world from "the Boy"!

I know it has been a while since I have written, but I went through some tough times and I gave up writing for awhile, which made my teachers a little upset. My new counselor, Mr. Todd, gave me some advice to start expressing my feelings by writing, but not showing it to anyone. So for awhile I followed exactly what he said. This was after I came back from a shortened trip to writing camp. Dad had to pick me up early because I was so upset about Grandpa and Gretchen that I wrote some things that made some people worried about me so they called my dad. I guess after that I felt really bad about everything, including my writing and school and didn't want to do anything. My parents decided to send me to counseling and that didn't work because I wouldn't say anything to Mrs. Birch, so I stopped going. Dad kept me home from school for one whole week in October and allowed me to sleep a lot and to watch the leaves fall off the trees at our ranch. Some people said that my parents were being silly, but he let me anyways and even let me watch a lot of t.v. After my week off, Dad told me about this new counselor, Mr. Todd, and how he helped Dad's friend David's daughter Wendy after her Mom died. So, I started going to see Mr. Todd and he got me writing again to myself and then finally said that I should write to other people.
Losing people that you love is really hard and that part of you that was changed because of those people also goes away. Losing Grandpa Jem made me empty because everyday I looked forward to talking to him and even though he was sometimes too tired he would always tell me a story or ask about my life or just make me laugh. What hurt more was that when Gretchen moved away, I didn't have Grandpa to talk to and to get advice from to make me feel better. It hurt like nothing I had ever felt before and I just didn't know how to feel better. Dad says that it is also a tough time because my body is changing too and that it was a bad time for my "whole world to change" too. What made matters worse is that Tom's parents took him out of our school and have sent him to school in town back in September. They thought Tom wasn't learning anything and even though he didn't want to leave he had no choice. I might end up joining him someday soon because I guess some people in town want to shut down my school and there is a lot of stressed out people coming in and out of the school lately. Mr. Grady won't tell me much, but he and other teachers have said that we should all write down exactly everything we are learning so we can prove to those people in town that are school is good and that we are all learning a lot. Somebody said it is because our math scores are low and that proves we aren't learning anything. That made me mad because what I learn at school goes way beyond Math. I am learning so much about how to be a good writer and Dad says that they don't really seem to care how great I write a story just "how well I can read directions and follow them". I said that Math is hard "because the directions don't make sense".
Anyway, if I had to go to the big school in town, I would be really unhappy and now because of that I really love going to my small school again and have met some new friends and will be going to Death Valley next month and to Catalina Island in the spring. I love field trips and wish I could go somewhere every week!
Well I guess things could be better, but I have learned lately that they can always be worse. So, I must go for now and work on my fractions.
Till next time,
Jem Bigsky III

2006-08-09T22:38:00.000-07:00

From July 20, 2005:

Howdy!
Welcome to the "Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch" blog site. This site is devoted to ancestral and anecdotal stories of the Bigsky family as told by Jem Bigsky III. The Bigsky family lives and works in California and has, ever since Jerry Buckheister moved there in 1948 and became the legendary silverscreen singing cowboy, Jem Bigsky.
The stories are collected and retold to you by one imaginative and inquisitive 12 year-old boy (now 13), who is fondly referred to by his loved ones as, "The Boy", especially by his father, Jem Bigsky II. Look for his weekly entries here as well as the occasional photo of the family.

2006-07-29T21:14:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the last day of school for the trimester and since I missed over a week when Grandpa Jem passed away, I have had to work extra hard to finish all of my projects except my ancestor project which I was given an "extension" until next trimester. Mrs. Butcher and Mr. Grady agreed to let me finish later because it has been tough finishing a project that involves Grandpa Jem. The project is not the important thing on my mind these days. I have had a really hard time getting used to not seeing Grandpa every day and often I go into his room expecting to see him and all that is there is his empty chair. Just thinking about it is making me sad and I am not sure when I will feel better. To make matters worse, Gretchen is leaving for good next week. I cannot even think about it because it is yet another person leaving my life. I have cried about Grandpa Jem many times, but I haven't cried about Gretchen leaving and even though she hasn't cried in front of me, she has come close many times. Since yesterday was our last day of school, it was also Gretchen's last day. She seemed happy to finish her work, but sad that she wasn't going to be coming back. We could hardly look at each other because I think we were both afraid to cry at school in front of everyone. Mrs. Butcher seemed to know what was going on below the surface however and she asked me if I was doing ok. I said that I was ok, but somehow, even though I knew this day might come, it doesn't seem real. She just nodded her head and put her hand on my shoulder and said "Sometimes life doesn't seem very real until time has passed and we have time to put things in perspective". I wasn't sure exactly what she meant, but I just looked down at my feet and said "thank you Mrs. Butcher". She asked how my family was doing and I said "ok, I guess" and said that my Dad is taking it real hard.
It has been good to spend lots of time on my school work lately to take my mind off of everything. But now that I am finished I don't know what to do and Mom has suggested I go back to the counselor next week before I go to writing camp, even though I don't really feel like going to camp anymore. Both Mom and Dad think I should still go to camp because being around the house will just make me more sad. I guess I agree with that and I have decided to go to camp a week from tomorrow. Grandpa seemed happy when I told him about camp and he would be disappointed if I didn't go.
Well, this is a tough way to start the second year of my blog "Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch", but hopefully I will feel like writing about Gretchen leaving and more about my family and Grandpa's life. I finally found the piece of paper with the combination to Grandpa's locker written on it. I had been looking for it since he passed away and was feeling awful that maybe I had lost it for good and that we would never get the locker open. Also, I was upset that Grandpa had trusted only me with the combination and that I had already let him down and he had only been dead for a few days! I cried and cried about losing the combination, but Mom said that it wasn't really the paper I was crying about and I said "but no one will ever see his writings now!" and became more angry than sad and Mom held me until I calmed down. Just when I thought that Dad was going to have to pry open the locker, I found the paper inside the one old shoe that I had left. It is strange because I don't remember putting it in there, but then I couldn't remember exactly where I had put it in the first place (as I shrugged my shoulders).
"Perspective" means "a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view" or "true understanding of the relative importance of things; a sense of proportion". "Its use (besides Mrs. Butcher's): "we must keep a sense of perspective about what he's done."
That usage gives me an idea to look through Grandpa's locker and write a story about his life from the writings and pictures that I find. I guess then I could learn about Grandpa Jem and his life from a new "perspective".

The painting is by Vincent Van Gogh.

2006-07-22T19:48:00.000-07:00

2006-07-14T14:04:00.000-07:00

My Grandpa Jem has passed away. He died at night on Tuesday at the hospital. Last week he had started to feel sick after riding a horse for the first time in months. The next day Dad took him to the doctor and he said that Grandpa was not well and he needed to go to the hospital. On his way to the hospital he had a "major stroke" but survived three days before passing away right after Dad left the hospital on Tuesday. The funeral is on Monday and relatives are flying in from all over the country.
Dad didn't want Grandpa to ride our horse Bella, but Grandpa really wanted to and said that he was going to whether Dad wanted him to or not. He did seem to feel better that day and since it was his anniversary with Grandma, he said that he wanted to ride a horse to help honor her. Mom thinks that somehow Grandpa knew he was going to die soon and wanted to ride one last time. I can hardly write about this without crying, but I wanted to let people know why I had not written in awhile and it is helping me to deal with my Grandpa's death. I will write more after the funeral is over and once I return to school.
Thinking of Grandpa Jem...

2006-06-28T22:31:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of Grandma Sylvia when she was 21 years old.
She was born Sylvia Lugo and she grew up in New Jersey during the great depression of the 1930's. According to Aunt Gloria (Mom's sister) and Grandma Sylvia herself, my great Grandfather Carlos Lugo was born in Northern Spain and moved to America during the 1920's because of a dictatorship. Great Grandpa Carlos and his new wife, my Great Grandma Gloria (who was American) went back to Spain briefly after Grandma Sylvia was born in 1928, but came back because of a civil war in Spain during the 1930's. Grandma had told me that growing up was hard because they moved a lot and when Great Grandma Gloria died when Grandma Sylvia was only 15 it was really tough. Her Father was very sad and drank a lot after her Mother's death and after Great Grandpa Carlos died a few years later, she moved in with Grandpa Jessie who was stationed in New Jersey while in the army. Eventually, Grandpa Jessie and Grandma Sylvia got married and moved to Minnesota where Grandpa Jessie grew up.
The picture was taken when Grandma first met Grandpa and they were going to a dance at the Army hall when she decided to get the picture taken "in her nice new clothes" at Sears.
I will put more pictures on my blog in the next few weeks of Grandpa Jessie and the rest of the Michaels side of my family.
I had forgot to give people an update about the racoons that were staying in the barn behind the hay. The music and talk-radio idea worked somewhat, but the racoons just moved to the other side of the barn in a different hay stack. So, Dad waited patiently (after I begged him) for a few more days and once the cubs started going out on their own, we trapped the Mom and released her a few miles away near an empty house on the other side of the pond. Then we trapped the cubs separately and brought them over to the abandoned house. The old farmhouse is thought to be haunted and people stay away from it, except for some crazy high school students who dare each other to go in. We haven't seen any racoons since then, but I did find a sick pigeon that was by himself on the road near our house that nearly had gotten run over by a passing pickup truck. The pigeon seemed very disoriented, especially after the truck drove right over the top of it with only the wind from the truck moving the poor sick bird. I then grabbed an old grain sack from the barn and wrapped it around the bird and brought it to a fenced in part of the yard that I know wouldn't have any other animals in it and put it in there. I know Dad would be upset if he caught me because birds have diseases sometimes, so I hid the bird in the corner out of the sun and tried to feed it crushed peanuts with a little dish of water. The bird, whom I named Rodney, wouldn't eat and just laid there quivering while I practiced drawing in my journal for drawing class. Just as I finished shading in Rodneys gray feathers, I looked up and Rodney had died. I then dug a hole behind the fence where I knew the dogs wouldn't dig and put Rodney in with one of my old shoes that Mom let me keep around even though they were falling apart. Maybe it would have been better if Rodney had been run over by a truck since it would have been faster, but I think it is better to leave the world as you entered it...having someone to care for you.

2006-06-21T22:07:00.000-07:00

This is the part of the year where it is a little tough to stay focused on school because the weather has been so nice and the days so long. We still have a month or so left until our summer break which is our "long" break. This year I am going away for a couple of weeks to writing camp in Oregon. Over the weekend, Dad and I went to Anaheim for an orientation meeting for the camp so that we could find out more about it and meet some of the counselors in person. It was a little goofy and it seemed the counselors tried too hard to make the camp seem "really fun" so that hopefully Dad would "pay up front", as he put it, which he did. So, for two weeks in early August, I'll be taking writing workshops and playing kickball with people named Wendy and Mark. Tom's parents heard about my plans and decided to send him to "Tech camp" in San Diego. Tom really likes video games and computers and wants to learn how to make animated games for the computer. That sounds ok, but a little too much indoor time for me. I prefer taking my journal to an empty field or by a river and write about life. Mom says that "differences are what make us all unique" and that she is happy that I am not like practically every other teen who is obsessed with tv and video games.

Mom said that Aunt Gloria has finally gotten some pictures of Mom's side of the family, the Michaels, and is sending them in the mail this week. Mom said that Aunt Gloria is a "picture-hog" and has kept most of the family pictures for herself to put on her picture wall in her den and is worried that I would lose them so she didn't give me any when I was there last time. Mom said that Aunt Gloria has finally made copies of some of them so that we could just keep them and I can now finally finish my ancestor project by next month. I hope there are some good ones of Grandpa Jessie and Grandma Sylvia when they were young so that I can see who I take after more, my Mom or my Dad.
A note about Cousin Thomas, the former basketball player: Uncle Don told Dad that Cousin Thomas once ran for congress in New York State and lost "by one point" which seems sad and that he lost because the newspaper found out that he represented a famous "terrorist" once in the 1970's in court. I guess that a lot of people disliked him after that and that is why he lost his election. Uncle Don also said that Cousin Thomas has heard about my project and he wants me to call him this weekend. I am excited about that because I am curious about the "terrorist" and why he decided to run for congress in the 1980's. I also want to know about his basketball games and what it was like to be a popular sports star in college. So, if he reads this he'll know what kind of questions I'll ask him before I call him (Uncle Don gave him the website address). Mr. Grady says that a good reporter lets the person he or she is interviewing know about the questions before the interview so that they can have answers ready and it won't take as much time or be too surprising for the person being interviewed. It is called "preping" the interviewee. I guess "preping" is short for preparing although it isn't much of an abbreviation. I often wondered about abbreviations some time and about how many there are now, especially the "acronyms" which are "a word formed from the initial letters of other words", like "DVD" or "SUV". When I asked Grandpa about it in a letter, he wrote back that "Time is money and the world is in too much of a hurry to make more of it." I assume he meant more money and not more time since no one is quite sure how to create more time. We have found a way to capture time with photographs and moving pictures, but so far we have been unable to make more time. "There are only 24 hours in a day" I heard somone say in a commercial on television, um I mean T.V. I guess those people who feel that way try to make more time by using less of it when they speak or write and find it easier to say letters instead. I guess that "lol" and "btw" are ones I have mentioned before that have been added by the internet as well as "blog" and it is a little easier to write "Thanx" or "xmas" instead of "Christmas" and I guess that is why Puff Daddy changed his name to P Diddy or I guess it is even shorter now (Gretchen told me that or else I wouldn't know - honest). So, maybe I should change my name to J-Sky or something like that. Does anyone have suggestions? Gretchen has suggested "JB3". I am not sure but it definitely made me lol.

2006-06-11T21:36:00.000-07:00

Writing all these letters has helped me stay focused in school because I write about what is happening everyday and it helps me remember all the things I have to do. Yesterday, was Gretchen's birthday and if I hadn't written to Grandpa on Wednesday that I needed an idea for a gift for her, I may not have thought to ask him and he wouldn't have given me such a good idea. He said that I should buy her a kite so that we could have something to do on those windy summer days. I wrote back that I thought it was a great idea and I would go after school with Tom over to the hobby store on Grover St. I looked through the kites and found a make-your- own-kite kit that seemed good, but I didn't know if I would have time to finish it so I bought another one in a shape of a fish that looks like Nemo for Gretchen and bought the make-your-own for me. Earlier today, Gretchen and I went to the park in town and tried to fly her kite (mine isn't ready yet), but it wasn't windy enough to get the kite to stay in the air. We had a lot of fun trying though and we ran so much that afterwards we just layed in the grass and looked at the clouds and even fell asleep for a short time. Of course, we ate ice cream afterwards with money that Dad gave us. I think that the kite was Gretchen's favorite birthday gift and we are planning on going kite flying every Sunday after church with or without the wind.
In the hobby store, I met a man named Danny who was what Mom called "mildly retarded" or maybe had "Down Syndrome". "Down Syndrome" is "a congenital disorder arising from a chromosome defect, causing intellectual impairment and physical abnormalities including short stature and a broad facial profile." Danny worked at the hobby store and knew a lot about kites, trains, and other hobbies, but mostly enjoyed riding horses and cheerleading for the special olympics, which is a sporting event for people with handicaps. Danny liked the hat I was wearing and asked if any famous baseball players had signed it. I said "no", but I asked if he would sign my hat and he seemed happy to do so. "Danny #1" is what he signed on the inside of my baseball hat and there seemed to be a lot of joy that came from such a simple act. Danny told me how he liked to do word search puzzles on his free time when he isn't riding horses in competition. He also said that this summer he is going to Denmark to learn about how they ride horses there and to visit his relatives. Danny seemed happy no matter what he was doing or what he was talking about and he seemed to make every one else in the store happy also, except Tom who was mad because the comic book he wanted wasn't in. Danny and I gave each other our phone numbers and addresses and he promised to mail me a postcard from Denmark. I said that I would come to watch him ride horses in the next competition. Afterwards, I thought about Danny all day and how cheerful he was and how good he made you feel just talking with him.
At first, I wanted to make my kite into a blue falcon, but now I have decided that since Gretchen and I will fly our kites together that maybe mine should also look like a fish so that our kites are two fish in a big blue sky-pond.

Windy Summer Days

   K B O K G S Z T S J S D H Y D
   X R I O Z L S D A H U E O M T
   A T A G A R U H S I F B B O F
   E W G P S O P I C N I C B Y N
   Z J M G L K W Q F R Y O Y C F
   A O M C C K Y R V I B P P W L
   Y M U S X F X G R A I Z A Z Y
   M U O G K S D Z L K C D C K P
   A R N D P B O U K Q C T I B T
   E R X J E Y W J M F S G B H F
   R E X U A G H T X M I Z P J U
   C H S A D S H E P W N V S N A
   E B W Q B Y M K D U A R U U P
   C O R R M K Y U H T X I Z Y N
   I W M S X A F X I T E W A G E

BIGSKY
CLOUDS
FISH
HOBBY
ICECREAM
KITE
PARK
PICNIC


http://puzzlemaker.school.discovery.com/WordSearchSetupForm.html


The painting is by James C. Christensen

2006-05-31T22:12:00.000-07:00

"Dear Grandpa,
Today was a good day. I watched a movie at Gretchen's house called "Everything Illiterated", or something like that, about a young man who is on a quest to find and meet the woman who saved his Grandfather's life during World war 2 and hid him in a house where sunflowers grow. This young man finds two people to help him find this woman because it is in a foreign country and the young man cannot speak the language (Russian, I think). The two people that help him are a young man of similar age and his grumpy old Grandfather. They eventually find a woman who is actually the sister of the woman they were looking for, but the woman tells the story of the war and how her sister fell in love with the young man's Grandfather and had a baby.
The two guides (the other young man and his Grumpy grandfather) eventually get into a fight because the other young man hit his Grandfather's dog, but eventually make up when the grandfather learns to appreciate his grandson when he finally lets go of the war and all his anger when he hears the woman's story. Unfortunately, the Grandfather of the other young man then kills himself, but I guess he died happy because he finally felt better about his memories of the war. The travelling young man leaves and he is happy that he finally learned a lot about his grandfather and his past. The young man scooped up some dirt from the river bed that was near the place in that foreign country and took it home to add to his collection of things about his Grandfather (like me with your old cowboy hat). It was a great movie because it made me want to write this letter to my Grandfather and many others to come.
My writing teacher, Mr. Grady, has suggested that I pick a movie and re-write its ending. I decided to pick "Everything Obliterated" because I wanted to re-write the ending so that the other young man's grandfather doesn't kill himself, but instead buys his Grandson ice cream (just kidding). Actually, instead of killing himself, he teaches his grandson about how war never solves anything, but instead destroys families and villages and leads to many hungry people. And that the travelling young man learns about how lucky he was that his grandfather survived so that he could be born and collect things. Oh. Actually that part did happen in the movie.
I think Mr. Grady liked the idea, but seemed a little surprised that I didn't pick the X-MEN. I told him that the X-MEN is already perfect and doesn't need to be changed, except more scenes with Mystique in it (see picture).
Which movie would you pick Grandpa? and what would you change?
Love,
Your Grandson,
Jem 3"

2006-05-24T07:05:00.000-07:00

I decided to write a little before Mom drives me to school in an hour or so. From my room I smell breakfast cooking and this is the first morning since Grandpas fall that things seem back to somewhat normal. Grandpa came home on Sunday from the hospital and is recovering slowly although "one never knows for sure how the brain will recover from such an injury" said the doctor. We now have a nurse looking after Grandpa and her name is Anna. She works for an "agency" that provides home nurses. I think that having Anna around has been a big relief for everyone and it has only been one day since she started. Grandpa seems to like her but Dad says that with the medication for his pain that he should like her a whole lot when its time for his next pills. The doctor said that as long as Grandpa rests and doesn't try to get up too much that he should get better, but that the "mild stroke" he had should cause Grandpa to have problems doing simple things that he used to do fine before. I was curious what that might be and how I could help and the doctor said that I could keep talkng to him as much as possible to help keep his mind sharp. I said that I will try but "sometimes Grandpa Jem doesn't feel like talking". Dad then said that I should write him letters so that it will help Grandpa to remember things in case he starts to forget. I agreed and today at school during free period I will write him a letter telling him about my morning classes. I will try to remember to post it later.

Gretchen and I haven't seen very much of each other lately because of my trips to the hospital to see Grandpa and she has been spending a lot of time with her friend Beth who lives on the other side of the county. Her Mom has agreed to allow Gretchen to finish the trimester here which means she'll be staying until the end of July, but which also means that she will only be here for two more months. Gretchen and I are going to go see the X-men this weekend with Cousin Bruce, which will be great.
The blanket was designed by Paul Palcko and it shows the nurse as an earth angel. Mr. Grady said that it is ok to use images from the internet like I have because I am not trying to make money with my blog, but that I be sure to give the artist credit for his or her work of art. I usually only show pictures that I like so I really like telling everyone who made the artwork anyways. So, if anyone out there wants to send me pictures of their artwork then I will put it on my blog for the whole world to see. I had forgot to write that when I used a couple photographs before that they were made by my friend Amy Caterina from Orange County. I would like to see more photographs from Amy of flowers or other things and I also would like to see more pictures by "Cornbread" Anderson. Speaking of cornbread, Mom is telling me that breakfast is ready.

2006-05-16T21:31:00.000-07:00

Grandpa Jem hurt himself getting out of the shower last Saturday and had to be taken to the hospital. Everyone is really worried, including myself, and although he has hurt himself before, it has never been this bad. No one is quite sure what will happen because he hit his head on the floor and had lost consciousness. He is more aware now, but doesn't remember the fall. It took him a few moments to remember who Dad was when he woke up in the hospital, which scared everybody, but he soon remembered everyone, although he seemed more confused about why he was there than who anyone was. The doctors say that he may have had a serious "concussion" and may have bleeding in his brain, but they have to take tests first to know how much damage was caused. What makes matters worse is that he had been feeling sick a lot lately and that he may have had a "stroke" or maybe fainted and that is what caused his fall.
Dad has been trying to hire a nurse for Grandpa to take care of him even though Mom and Dad help him with almost everything, but Grandpa has refused to allow that. So, Dad was outside tending to the horses and Mom was cooking breakfast when Grandpa decided to take a shower and get out without anyone's help. I was getting dressed and didn't hear anything, but Dad eventually came in and found Grandpa lying on his bathroom floor unconscious. He quickly yelled to me to call 911 and Mom heard Dad and came in and took the phone and told the 911 people what had happened as Dad was yelling to her that Grandpa's head was bleeding and that he was "out cold" which means to be unconscious, but was still breathing. It took the local ambulance 15 minutes to get there which seemed like two hours or more and finally they came in and put a mask on Grandpa and slowly put him on a stretcher while wrapping him in a blanket. Dad told me later that he started to wake up in the back of the ambulance, but then lost consciousness again.
Everything in my life seems less important right now and all I can think of is Grandpa Jem and that he gets better. Although, I was curious and to help pass the time in the hospital I looked up a few of the words I have heard from the Doctor.
A "Concussion" is a "temporary unconsciousness caused by a blow to the head. The term is also used loosely of the aftereffects such as confusion or temporary incapacity."
A "stroke" is "a sudden disabling attack or loss of consciousness caused by an interruption in the flow of blood to the brain, esp. through thrombosis." "Thrombosis" is "local coagulation or clotting of the blood in a part of the circulatory system". It sounds like this "thrombosis" is what may have cause Grandpa to have a "stroke" and fall which caused a "concussion". I read that last sentence to Dad and he said that "one small problem can cause a lot of damage".
Dad seemed very relieved when Grandpa opened up his eyes, but I have never seen Dad look so worried and his worried look still hasn't gone away.

2006-05-07T21:56:00.000-07:00

The first week of the new school trimester has come and gone and I am taking a drawing class as well as my usual project classes (Math, Earth Science, English literature, and Advanced Journalism). They are called "project classes" because many of these subjects are combined together in a single project that can overlap between the different classes. For example, last semester my Mayan project earned me credit for my History class as well as credit in English (writing) because I wrote an analysis of their alphabet system and talked about how they recorded their historical stories. I also am still trying to earn credit in Math because I wrote a seperate report on the Mayan number system and how they developed different cyclical calenders to keep track of time. I am not sure it is enough however because Math has to specifically involve our own current system like Algebra. I guess I am just trying to avoid having to take more Math classes because I dislike it.

Dad discovered Raccoons in our barn that have been making a mess of our garbage at night and spent all weekend (with my reluctant help) trying to trap them. Dad says he thinks he has seen a mother with large nipples which means she probably has a litter somewhere in the barn and is trying to feed herself enough because she is probably still nursing. I decided to find out more about raccoons so I looked on the computer to see if they as harmful as my Dad says and how best to deal with them. Raccoons are "nocturnal" which means they come out at night, and they are often thought by many people to carrie rabies, which is a disease that humans can get that can be deadly, but they rarely get rabies and instead can get canine distemper which has similar symptoms to rabies. Distemper can effect dogs, but not people so it is probably best to catch the raccoons and move them somewhere else, but Dad wanted to catch them and kill them. I didn't like that idea and told Dad so, but he said "it has to be done".
Dad set up the cage in the lower part of the back barn and put a cracker with peanut butter on it in a cage (trap) on Friday night. I was hoping to get up early on Saturday to see if the mother raccoon was in the cage, but I guess Dad put the cracker only part of the way in to make the raccoon "comfortable" and so it would continue to come back. Raccoons are one of the smartest animals and therefore you have to take time to be able to "outwit" them into eventually taking the cracker at the end of the cage past the "trigger plate".
More about raccoons...
Female raccoons usually have an average of four babies in a litter and pregnancy usually lasts for nine weeks and cubs are born in the Spring (like most animals). The young begin to accompany their mother on excursions by early June, but until then they are dependent on the mother's milk. They have had to adapt to changing habitat because of Humans and often make homes out of abandoned buildings, old beaver lodges, car bodies, wood piles, abandoned badger and coyote dens, attics, chimneys, and hay stacks. The hay stack is probably where they are living in our barn. Many raccoons are killed because people like their fur and can sell it for a lot of money and some people even eat the raccoon because they taste good, although I have never eaten one.
Raccoons can be driven out of chimneys and other locations by placing a flashing light near the entry to their den and by turning on a talk radio station and putting the radio near by. Spraying garbage with ammonia will also keep the raccoons out of the garbage, especially if the lid is fastened tightly. I also read that if you leave a sandwich with peanut butter mixed with hot sauce that when the raccoons eat it, it will be upset enough to leave the area thinking that all the food there will taste like that. I guess the peanut butter hides the smell of the hot sauce. I heard it can get rid of bears also.
I told all this to Dad and I said that I don't want him to kill the mother because then the babies will die too and we should try some of the things I read about first. He reluctantly agreed (thats twice I have used my new word "reluctant") and we decided to drive them out with sports talk radio at night and Rush Limbaugh during the day, which Mom said "would drive anyone away". So far, as of tonight, it hasn't worked yet, but the website said to give a mother and her cubs up to a week to relocate. If that doesn't work than we might have to try the "peanut butter and chili" sandwich.
"Reluctant" means "unwilling and hesitant; disinclined" and an example is "I am reluctant to kill anything as cute as a raccoon".

2006-04-27T18:42:00.000-07:00

I have enjoyed my spring break, but I am looking forward to getting back to my daily routine at school and having a better trimester than the last one. I have been doing a lot more writing in my journal and have started writing letters to Gretchen. She seems to really enjoy my letters and I do feel like I am satisfying everyone in my life because of these letters. My Mom and Dad are happy to see me with a pencil in my hand even if I am not writing anything important. I am trying to decide if I should post my letters to Gretchen and mostly I think it is a bad idea because they are meant for just her only. The letters to Grandma from Grandpa are now 'history' as Grandpa puts it and therefore are no longer so private. It makes me feel sad for Grandpa when he talks about Grandma because he has trouble hiding his emotions when he is talking about her. He mentioned yesterday that he proposed to Grandma inside of a redwood tree in northern California and said that the tree is a symbol for their love. It has a very strong base and it "stands the test of time". I thought that it was very poetic and even though I didn't mention to him that nothing lasts forever like I was thinking (and like Mom has said before), Grandpa started weeping slowly and with less force than when Gretchen was crying. He wiped his eyes and went on to say how perfect that trip was and how every place they went seemed to be waiting for the "two lovers walking hand-in-hand". He said that they even saw whales along the shore near San Francisco that seemed to be singing them a love song. Grandpa said that he chimed in with a verse or two of an old mariner song and that Grandma cryed when he did. All this talk of crying was making me sad and I just swollowed the lump in my throat and gave Grandpa a hug. He seemed to feel a lot better after his nap and even told a few jokes at dinner which made me squirt a little milk out of my nose (like Dad on our camping trip). He told a joke about a Cowboy and his Grandson and it went something like this:

A tough old cowboy counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gun powder on his oatmeal every morning.

The grandson did this religiously to the age of 103. When he died, he left 14 children, 30 grand-children, 45 great grandchildren, 25 great-great grand children, and a 15 foot hole where the crematorium used to be.

I actually know what a "crematorium" is, but for those who don't know it is "a place where a dead person's body is cremated". Dad's response was "If you can't laugh at death what can you laugh at?" That's a good question and even though Grandpa didn't answer him, I would say that the only thing we have over death is to laugh at it.

2006-04-19T23:10:00.000-07:00

Some people told me how much they liked my last entry and the letter from Grandpa Jem to Grandma Lucy that I thought I would post another, but first I 'd like to tell you about my trip to Utah with Mom to see her friend Mary Jo (I forgot to ask Mom if there is an 'e' in Jo). It was a really nice trip and we stayed outside of a city called "St. George". We also spent one day at Zion National Park, which was very beautiful with many colorful rocks and cliffs.

I also learned a lot about Utah's history from Mary Jo and her boyfriend, Nick. Nick is a Native American and his ancestors, like some of mine, came from what is now Missouri. Although, his ancestors were there a long time before mine moved there and some are still there. Mary Jo and Nick told me about how the name Utah came from a tribe of Native peoples called Utes. There was also ancient people called Anasazi and Fremont Indians and there is a record of them being there since before the birth of Christ. Dinosaurs bones have also been found in Utah that could be over 50 million years old. That seems like a really long time ago! The period that those dinosaurs may have lived is called the "Mesozoic era", which is when the first mammals appeared.
Utah also has a history involving a struggle for land and who gets to use its resources. A lot of land is still owned by the government and therefore the people of Utah, but many companies are trying to buy it and "clear-cut it" as Mary Jo says. She also talked about the struggle to keep underground water from being "grabbed" by big cities like Las Vegas, who need a lot of water. I told Mary Jo about what Dad and Cousin Bruce have been doing about water in California and she said it is similar in Utah except that a "commission" in Nevada wants to "pump the water down to Las Vegas". I asked what a "commission" is and Mary Jo said that it is a group of people that represent "districts" of people. She also said that they plan to use a 500 mile pipeline to Las Vegas if they finally "get their way". I asked what she means and she said that "so far the people of Utah have refused to allow it to happen". "Thats good", I said and Nick stopped eating his turkey sandwich and said "Las Vegas won't give up until they get as much water as they need". "Oh" I said and Nick said that there are now almost 2 million people living around Las Vegas and the city only gets 4.5 inches of rain per year. We then talked about the damn projects around the Grand Canyon and Lake Powell and how that helps people get water, blah, blah, blah. "I've been to the Grand Canyon!" I said, which disrupted the conversation for a moment, but the adults kept right on talking. Mom seemed very interested in the conversation, but it is one I have heard around my house many times and I decided that I would go walk Mary Jo's dog, Zeus, down to the end of the road and watch the sunset. Zeus is a border collie with a lot of energy and he made me run all the way back to Mary Jo's house. Zeus seemed to figure out right away that I am a dog-person and that he could get me to go anywhere he wanted to go just by giving me the "sad eyes" as Mom calls it. I had fun taking walks or "runs" with Zeus and he seemed to be sad when I was leaving.
The picture is Utah from space.

Now for the letter...

"My Dearest Lucy,
It is outrageous of me to feel as strong as I do for you after such a short time, but I do. What is even more amazing is how cold I have been for so long and how warm I am feeling now. It is almost too abrupt a change in temperature and I feel like I do when I run my cold hands under hot water after being outside during a winter storm without my gloves on. An intense stinging has set in and I tremble with the thrill of knowing you. I am thankful for the times when you allow me to put my cold hands against your warm skin even though it gives you an unexpected jolt. If you only knew how far down your warmth goes when you touch me like you do. Your warm embrace has begun to break through the wall of ice around me and I have been allowed to slowly seep through the cracks, spilling out at your feet.
I am so grateful for you and the time we share together.
Love,
Jem

2006-04-12T23:29:00.000-07:00

My school is on vacation until May 1st for spring break. Just to remind my readers (Mr. Grady suggested I remind people of past entries because people forget), my school is on a trimester calender which means we go to school for three months and then have three weeks off, except in the summer when we have 4 weeks off in August. It is different then most schools, but I like it. I didn't have a very good trimester at school though and had to turn in a couple projects late and got only a satisfactory grade in Math. My parents were very upset at me for getting average marks and everyone thinks it is because I spend too much time with Gretchen and not enough time studying. My school likes to say that you can turn any type of learning into a project for credit and we are always told to "explore your curiosity". I told Dad that I am curious about girls, especially Gretchen, and I said that I should get credit for learning how to be a boyfriend. Mom said that I probably could get credit in English if I would write about my experiences more like she had told me before. I guess she is right and I already get credit for my writing journal which sometimes becomes part of my blog. I guess that I am afraid that I can't write about everything because people will think that I am strange because of what I think about. I also tell some people about my blog and I don't want people to get upset if I write something embarrassing or private about them. I don't want people to know that sometimes I am unhappy about myself and feel depressed, especially since I found out Gretchen is probably going to leave in June. I am so confused about what "love" is and how to decide how to love or what to love or when to love. I also sometimes just feel sad for no reason and sometimes angry and I just want to know why really liking someone can make you feel so good, but also really sad and frightened. I said all of this to Mom and Dad really fast and I think they wondered where this was being kept all this time. I said that even though I write a lot, I don't write about things that really bother me because I guess I would rather tell stories or write about things that I can find answers to on the computer or in the dictionary. When I looked up "love" or "sadness", the definitions didn't really help me feel better. Mom said that maybe I could go talk to a counselor and I said ok, but I want to talk to someone like Cousin Bruce. "A yoga instructor?" Dad said. "No, someone younger than you guys" I said back, which maybe made sense to Mom, but Dad said "Older people have more experience and they were young once too". Gretchen kind of laughed when I told her that I was going to a "shrink" as Grandpa calls it, but I said that it is because I am crazy for her and sad that she is leaving. She stopped laughing after I said the part about being sad and she started to cry. I had never her seen her cry before like that and all I could do is hold her and tell her how wonderful and beautiful she is and that everything is going to be alright, even though I need to go to a counselor to have them probably tell me the same thing.

Last night, Grandpa Jem brought me an old shoebox full of old love letters between he and Grandma when they started dating. Grandpa said that the hardest part of growing up is learning how to handle "feelings of amore" as he called it, which means love. He said that I should never be "afraid of love" or embarrassed about my feelings even though they might not always be returned. But when you meet someone who loves you as much as you love them, you should never be afraid to express the way you feel" Grandpa said. "Read these letters and let it inspire you to write love letters to your sweetest", he said "Write, boy, write!" He then said to write my feelings onto paper, that way she will always save it and it becomes a "concrete declaration of your love for her".
Here is a letter from Grandpa to Grandma...

"My Dearest Lucy,
This past five weeks have been overwhelming, but miraculous. You have restored my faith in love and magic and I truly believe it is fate that has brought us together. You may think you don't deserve me as I think that I don't deserve you, but we are both wrong. It is this brutal, pitiless world that doesn't deserve us. We are two honest people who won't accept a magic-less existence for the sake of stability and certainty. We both left those worlds behind to follow our hearts, our dreams and to bask in a warmer light and we have found each other.
It has been a lonely journey. Often, I have felt like the North Star, solitary in the sky and without hope. You have been the comet that has appeared to warm my cold heart. I revolve around you as you revolve around me; two bodies caught in the pull of the other, together warming and making each stronger. It is harmony, my love, the balance that exists between us as we are so keenly aware of the prescence of the other. Knowing when to listen gracefully or when to crash into one another to enjoy the essence of our intimate passions is second nature. There is a purpose now in my journey, a purpose materialized by the light of your soul, a light brighter and warmer than a thousand stars.
No matter where we go from here, you have erased my doubts and rekindled my dreams. Thank you.
Love, Jem"

2006-03-31T21:46:00.000-08:00

I am usually spending Friday night with Gretchen or Tom, but tonight I spent it with Grandpa Jem watching old movies (well we made it through one-and-a-half). We watched a movie called "Jim Thorpe, All-American" and started to watch a movie that Grandpa had a small part in called "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral". Both movies starred one of Grandpas favorite actors, Burt Lancaster. I stopped the movie because Grandpa fell asleep and I decided to do some writing. Grandpa doesn't fall asleep nearly as fast as Dad when watching movies and actually Grandpa is really happy when an old movie is on and usually stays awake all the way through, like with "Jim Thorpe". "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral" is about the legendary western marshal Wyatt Earp and is played by Burt Lancaster also.

Burt Lancaster was an actor who was in over 80 films, including famous ones like "From Here to Eternity" and "Field of Dreams". Grandpa said that he was also in one of Grandmas favorite movies "The Rose Tattoo". Lancaster started out as a circus performer before becoming an actor after World War 2 and always was known for being in great physical shape. He participated in Dr. Martin Luther King's March on Washington in August 1963 and was a "financial supporter" of Dr. King and the Southern Christian Leadership Conference. One of his five children, Bill Lancaster, wrote the screenplay for "The Bad News Bears" and it was based on Bill's experience as a baseball player on a team coached by his father, Burt. His first TV role was as a guest on "Sesame Street" in 1969, where he recited the alphabet.
Jim Thorpe was also an amazing and interesting person, but he was an athlete and not an actor. Jim Thorpe played many different sports such as baseball, football and he ran track and field in the 1912 olympics in Belgium. Unfortunately, they took away his medals because he played professional baseball for two years before the Olympics and I didn't understand why, but Grandpa said that to be in the Olympics you have to be an "amateur" athlete. I said "What about Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson, were they amateurs?" and Grandpa said no, that like everything else "the Olympics has become about money and television ratings". Jim Thorpe's mother was a Potawatomi Indian and was a descendent of Chief Black Hawk He also played for and coached a football team in the 1920s that was made of all Native American players called the Oorang Indians. He even led an all-Native American song and dance "troupe" entitled “The Jim Thorpe Show.”
A "troupe" is a "a group of dancers, actors, or other entertainers who tour to different venues". An example of its use is "our theater troupe is on tour" and I suppose "a troupe of amateurs" could also make sense here, but only if they were not getting paid.
When I looked up Jim Thorpe on the internet and saw a picture of him, I realized that he looks nothing like Burt Lancaster even though they both were athletic. Actually, I should probably say that Burt Lancaster looks nothing like Jim Thorpe since he was supposed to be him in the movie. I would guess that Burt Lancaster looks more like Wyatt Earp than Jim Thorpe, but I suppose people watching movies have to use their imaginations just like people reading books have to.

2006-03-22T21:34:00.000-08:00

Cousin Mat was on ESPN over the weekend in a bodybuilding competition in Los Angeles. Cousin Bruce said that he did pretty well, but he wasn't sure if he won first place. I am not exactly sure how you win first place; maybe if he looks more curvy than everyone else and if you lift the most weight. Of course, I am just guessing and maybe someday I'll get to ask Cousin Mat all about it. Although, I am not as interested in that than I am with my Mayan history project, which has been my favorite project besides my own family history project for this tri-mester.

I learned recently that the Mayans had developed a few different calenders or ways to measure time and cycles of nature. They were a highly accurate 365-day solar year, a 260-day ritual year, and a world-time calendar of 5,128 years. The world-time calendar provides a point in time when the world began (3,114 B.C.) as well as an ending date of Dec. 21, 2012. Some people think that the 2012 date is when the world will actually end, but some historians think that it is just when a new cycle will begin. My history teacher thinks that the world probably won't end anytime soon. Whew!
The Mayans (or Maya in some books) also developed a number system based on dots and bars with the earliest known number representing zero - it looks like a shell. With this system any number could be written, even really big ones. The priests, who were important in mayan society, relied on their knowledge of "astronomy, mathematics and numerology" to plan and make big decisions regarding when and where to grow food or where to build new structures. Unlike the later Aztecs, the Mayans had no central king or president which controlled a big empire. Instead, there were as many as "20 politically sovereign polities", similar to ancient Greece city-states. "Polities" or a "polity" is "a form or process of civil government or constitution; an organized society; a state as a political entity". Ok, thats now three semicolons that I have used in this entry in case you are keeping track at home.
So, that is some of what I have learned lately about Mayan culture, but I don't want to tell everything because this blog is supposed to be about the Bigsky family and its history. I do think that it is interesting when I read about how the Mayans mysteriously declined hundreds of years ago and how scientists believe that it had something to do with over-population and the "resulting exhaustion of land resources". It also said that the rain forest doesn't have the best soil because it gets "exhausted" or tired quickly. I mentioned this to Dad and he said that to his knowledge, many civilizations have declined because they abused the land and it stopped producing enough "for ever-growing populations". "Is that why many people are starving in Africa?" I said and Dad said that "not just in Africa but all over".
So, I looked on the internet and found that actually there are almost 5 billion people living in places that are considered "developing" and that 17% of those people are "undernourished" or over 800 million people!! That includes places like Africa, China, Korea, Mexico, and Haiti (which has 47% of their people that are undernourished). This information is from the "Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations". "Undernourishment" means "the condition of people whose dietary energy consumption is continuously below a minimum dietary energy requirement for maintaining a healthy life and carrying out a light physical activity".
I wonder how much energy Cousin Mat needs to "carry out" his daily physical activity.

2006-03-14T17:43:00.000-08:00

Gretchen and I spent part of the day together on Sunday and it seems like it had been awhile since we were together because I was really sick and last week Gretchen got sick. It was the first time in a few weeks that we both felt well. It was a nice day and we walked all the way to the end of our road and down to Hutchinson farm near the railroad tracks. We came home and Mom had dinner ready and we ate goulash which is Gretchens favorite meal when she comes over to the ranch. Most importantly we finally got to kiss again and I really enjoy kissing her so much that I didn't want to stop, but Dad came to my room and said that Gretchens Mom was outside. Gretchen says that she tells her Mom almost everyday that she doesn't want to leave California and her Mom says that she misses her friends in New Mexico and she wants to go back before summer. I told her that maybe she could live with us and she just gave me a look that made it seem like what I said was nice but kind of silly. I said that it may be silly but "it never hurts to try", as Grandpa says. I feel like that I think about Gretchen way too often and I miss her a lot when I don't see her for a couple days and her Mom goes out a lot so Gretchen has to babysit all the time.
I asked my Mom what to do about my feelings for Gretchen and how I never want her to leave even though she may have to. Mom said that the hard part of life is losing people that you care about whether they die or just move away and that it is something that "never gets easier no matter how old you get". I said "that isn't really helping me Mom" and she said that sometimes what people need is just to feel loved and as long as you feel that way no matter how much it hurts if she leaves that "love conquers all and no matter how far away someone is, they are always with you". That kind of made me feel a little better, but not enough to make me feel like I did at the movie theater on Valentines day. "Being enamored with someone is the best feeling in the world", Mom said. Is that mean "in love" I said and she said "something like that". She said that it is best to "keep focused on the things you love in life", but that you have to be careful not to "put all your eggs in one basket". Mom then said that she has noticed that I don't talk about writing as much anymore and she hasn't seen me write at the kitchen table as often lately. "I know" I said, "but I have been reading more..." "and talking on the phone with Gretchen" Mom interrupted. She then suggested that I write letters to Gretchen so that I combine two things that I love. I said that I would but that I like the sound of her voice too much. "Its ok" Mom said "but don't forget about how much you like to write. That's all I am saying". "I love you Jem", she said "and anytime you feel bad, I will always be here." I told her "Thank you and I love you too".

"Enamored", means "in love with, infatuated with, besotted with, smitten with, captivated by, enchanted by, fascinated by, bewitched by, beguiled by; keen on, taken with; informal mad about, crazy about, wild about, bowled over by, stuck on, hot for, sweet on, carrying a torch for, moonstruck by; literary ensorcelled by" and an example of its use is "she was secretly enamored of the prince".

The painting is by Kate McCullough

2006-03-05T21:16:00.000-08:00

Flu season has started in California and I woke up today feeling good for the first time in awhile. It seems like I have been sick for a long time and the doctor says that I had a "serious flu". I missed school last week and I missed the printing of our second edition of the "Red Hill Reporter" for the semester. Gretchen brought me a copy on Friday and it had been over a week since I had seen her because we didn't want to get her sick. It was good to see her and to read the article that Tom wrote about the woman who was saved by her neighbor in last weeks flood. It has rained a lot the past 2 weeks and it seemed like I was really "under the weather" last week because of all the rain. Dad said that the rain is good because we are in a "drought", but that unfortunately it has caused some damage to the area.

Dad and cousin Bruce went to Los Angeles over the weekend to attend meetings and "rally" against the selling of our underground spring to "Water Barons". "Why is that bad?" I asked and Dad said that our town will loose the "exclusive usage of the small spring" to a big company that will sell it to people all over the state in plastic bottles. He also said that the company (which also makes chocolate) has said that because of the Colorado river that we don't need all the water in our spring and that our town will make money from the company buying the water from the county. Cousin Bruce said that because of the sale of our spring that our town and others in the county will eventually have to pay more to use water. I guess some people at the meeting got angry about the plan to take water away by using big plastic bags, which seems strange, and that the process pollutes and disrupts the environment. I asked "like what?" and Dad said that some ponds will eventually dry up and we won't be able to go fishing anymore in some of them. This made me mad! Now, I really know why Dad and Cousin Bruce are fighting the plan and I told them that I would tell people at school and write an article for this months "Reporter". They said that everyone should know about this problem and that then maybe more people would come out to fight against loosing our spring water. Even Grandpa Jem wrote a letter to our congressman asking for his support in the fight, which is great because usually Grandpa tells Dad that he is wasting his time and it was good to see Grandpa care about something which has helped him to feel better lately. For a while, Grandpa seemed depressed because he couldn't do very much and is in pain a lot, but now he talks with Dad more and even put on his boots yesterday afternoon and walked all the way to the end of the property and sat by the old pond with our youngest dog Max. Afterwards, Mom painted a color picture of Grandpa and Max by the barn and I later scanned it into the computer. Mom has gotten really good at painting and does it more than pottery now. While Dad and cousin Bruce were off fighting for the right to use our own water and keep our pond, Mom, Grandpa and a sick-but-getting-better "Boy" had a really nice saturday at the Lazy Eye Ranch.

"Drought" means "a prolonged period of abnormally low rainfall; a shortage of water resulting from this" and an example of its use is "this year's drought was devastating to cotton growers".

2006-02-24T08:40:00.000-08:00

From July 20, 2005:

Howdy!
Welcome to the "Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch" blog site. This site is devoted to ancestral and anecdotal stories of the Bigsky family as told by Jem Bigsky III. The Bigsky family lives and works in California and has, ever since Jerry Buckheister moved there in 1948 and became the legendary silverscreen singing cowboy, Jem Bigsky.
The stories are collected and retold to you by one imaginative and inquisitive 12 year-old boy, who is fondly referred to by his loved ones as, "The Boy", especially by his father, Jem Bigsky II. Look for his weekly entries here as well as the occasional photo of the family.

2006-02-16T18:11:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentines day! (a couple of days late) Well, it was a great one for me overall, even though things were a little strange at first with Gretchen. Luckily, Cousin Bruce told me to get flowers and to forget the chocolate since she doesn't really like it anyways. He also talked me through how to go about kissing her since I had never kissed a girl before. Just talking about it with Cousin Bruce made me really nervous, but he said that most likely it will be her first kiss also and that she'll be scared too. I sort of figured on that, but he said that it doesn't have to be perfect, but it just has too last longer than one second. He said to just pucker up and "plant" it on her so that my lips fit over one of hers and hers fits over one of my lips so that they lock together. Then I should hold it there, without pinching her lip, for at least three seconds and if she likes it and doesn't want you to stop then move my lips over the other lip to change lip position. Now, this was sounding a little complicated and I was nervous but he said "forget that last part" and that as long as I make it through three seconds then I have had my first kiss. Cousin Bruce then said that we would both figure it out from there. "Just go with the flow Cuz" said Bruce. "I may be from California" I said "but it doesn't mean I know how to do that". He said that everything will be alright and that I will remember this for the rest of my life. "I hope I remember it as a good memory" I said and Cousin Bruce just laughed. "You will. I am sure of it."

So, Dad dropped Gretchen and I off in town and we first ate lunch at a pizza restaurant called "Romeos", which only put more pressure on me. Gretchen was really happy about the flowers and she carried them with her all day. I think that the flowers became something good for her to hide behind when things seemed a little awkward, but either way they became a cushion for some of our nervousness. This was strange because we have hung out lots of times and have only felt this way the first time we went to the movies together months ago. But I guess things have been different since that one day at my house when she put her hand on my arm; as if there was some strange pressure on us to kiss or something. I think she feels it too because she has acted more scared around me since then and I don't know how to make it go away so that things can be like they were before. I mentioned this to Dad and he said that it was good that I talked to Cousin Bruce, but that I can always come and talk to him also. Dad said that when people get to be a teenager that things change and the way they feel about girls changes. Sometimes it seems to "happen over night" he said and I imagined a type of fairy, like the Tooth Fairy only different, coming down sprinkling dust on my brain making me more nervous around girls that are pretty. I also get other strange things happening, but I don't want to mention that right now. I guess the fairy also visits girls and makes them feel the same way around boys that they like. Maybe the fairy is what puberty really is or maybe there is no fairy at all. Dad also said that Valentines day always makes things different between boys and girls and that I don't have to do anything I don't want to. I said that I am curious about it and want to know what it is like and he said that "that's ok too, but don't tell her you are going to kiss her before you kiss her." "Why?" I said and he said because it will only make it more awkward and less romantic. "What does that mean?" I said and he said that romance is what makes people like each other more. "But what is it?" I said again and Dad just said "look it up in the dictionary". So I did and "romance" means...oh I guess that can wait... back to Valentines Day. So, after lunch which was really good, we walked down to the movie theater to go see "The Chronicles of Narnia" and along the way I had this urge to hold her hand, but I was scared so I didn't and it was ok because Gretchen had a death grip on the flowers with both hands and I would've had to pry one away and it didn't seem right. So, we went inside the theater and sat down further towards the back than usual, I am not sure why, and I decided to talk about something beside movies and books with her, which is what we usually talk about. So, I asked her if she ever received flowers on Valentines Day before and she said that last year in New Mexico, a boy named Ethan gave her flowers that "he picked from his front yard" and gave them to her. Hearing this made me feel like I wasn't very special anymore and even though I bought flowers that maybe she didn't feel the same feeling I did about my first real Valentines Day. Then I had an even worse thought that maybe she had already gotten kissed before and that she already knew how to do it and that I would make a fool out of myself. I was beginning to panic when she said the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me before, "I didn't really like Ethan so it doesn't count I guess. This is my first time getting flowers on Valentine's Day". Gretchen said that last sentence with a really nice smile on her face and I smiled back at her. She really knew just what to say and maybe she had seen the panic on my face even though I tried to hide it. Just as we were both smiling at each other, the lights in the theater went out and we could now barely see each other which was probably good because as soon as I realized the lights were going down there was a big look of relief on my face that I didn't want her to see.
Now that the movie was starting, I didn't have to think of things to talk about to hide my nervousness, but yet I felt even more nervous about the fact that I hadn't kissed her yet. I decided that I would just try to watch the movie and not think about it, but that didn't work. I kept looking over at Gretchen and thinking about what she said and I couldn't stop thinking about how much I liked her and how good she made me feel inside, which she does by just saying the few things that she says and by looking at me the way she does. Then all of a sudden my hand started moving for no reason and I reached out without thinking and grabbed her hand. She looked over and she moved to the side of the seat closest to me and she grabbed my hand and now was holding it with both of her hands and she leaned her head over and laid it on my shoulder. I couldn't believe how good I felt at that moment. I don't remember feeling that good ever before and even though the movie was really long it seemed to last about 45 minutes, and I couldn't really even say if it was good or not. We stayed all nestled together for more than half an hour until it seemed like she was getting uncomfortable so she sat up, but we still held hands for most of the movie until our hands became so sweaty that it was kind of slippery, so we let go.
After the movie, we sat on the bench waiting for Dad to pick us up and while we waited, we held hands again and I decided that now was as good a time as any since Dad's truck or her front porch didn't seem any better. So, I started by leaning against her and slowly tilted my head towards her cheek. I think she sensed what I was trying to do and if she hadn't turned her head too, i would've ended up kissing her eye so she tilted her head upwards and somehow magically we found our lips perfectly lined up and I moved in and did exactly what Cousin Bruce said and held it there for three seconds. What he didn't tell me was that it might be better if my lips were a little wet because hers were and mine weren't and they kind of stuck together which was a little embarrassing. Gretchen didn't seem to mind and once her wetness rubbed off on my lips it seemed a lot better. So, three seconds became more like ten and then Gretchen stopped and looked toward the parking lot and then at me and said "Isn't that your Dad's truck?" I looked and way over parked along the side near the grass was his truck. "Yeah. It is" I said and she started to smile and then she said "Its been over there for 10 minutes." and just as we were both looking at his truck a street light above it flickered on as day officially became night. Then the headlights came on and the truck started to slowly pull forward and as if he was hoping that we hadn't spotted him, he drove the long way around the lot and pulled up by the bench. Gretchen and I hopped in and Dad said, sounding a little embarrassed, "How was the movie?" "Really good" I said and we drove home.
Romance means "a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love" or it also means "wild exaggeration; picturesque falsehood ". I guess its how you look at it.

2006-02-07T20:09:00.000-08:00

One week from today is Valentine's Day and this might be the first time I ever give someone chocolate or even a card. Gretchen only likes chocalate ice cream and not real chocolate for some reason so I hope I can find heart-shaped chocolate ice cream bars. I think that I will ask her to see a movie and to have lunch on Saturday in town. I hope "The Chronicles of Narnia" is playing because Gretchen said that she wants to see that. Tom and I saw "Big Mommas House 2" last weekend and thought it was funny, but Dad thought it was a little "corny".

At the movies, I got to talk with Jorge, who works at the movie theater. I asked him if he knew if he had any Mayan ancestors that I could talk to and he said that a lot of present-day Mexicans have connections to "indigenous" people which means they are native to the land that is now Mexico, but that they don't always know exactly which group their ancestors were apart of. After the Spanish invaded their regions, many Mayans were killed and the ones that survived eventually integrated with the new "Conquistadors" and their culture which was from Spain or moved and integrated with other tribes of people. So, Jorge mentioned that a lot of present day Mexicans or Mexican-Americans came from Aztecs, which was a very large empire that existed between the 14th and 16th centuries. Jorge also said that his family can be traced back to Aztec ancestors from the 17th century and that many of them fought the Spanish and then the Americans "to maintain their independence". Eventually, his family stayed and became American citizens in the mid 1940's and his grandfather fought for America in world war 2. I thought that was sort of strange since some of his older ancestors fought against the Americans and then his Grandfather fought for America in the 1940's. "I guess things change over time and that in the end you fight for your land, no matter who is making the laws" said Jorge , or something like that, I forgot to bring my notebook and instead I wrote it down on a napkin that got a little wrinkled in my pocket. I still didn't quite understand how that works but I guess its like that episode of "Malcolm in the Middle" where malcolm is fighting his brother, Reese until a bigger bully starts picking on Malcolm so Reese decides to beat up the bully even though he was just beating Malcolm up just minutes before. I suppose fighting for land is a lot like that and that people will always have to fight to keep their territory from people who want to take it. "It is all part of human survival" Dad said, "there are always going to be bullies who are greedy and try to take something that isn't theirs". "Why do they do that?" I said. Dad just looked off into space for awhile and then said finally "because they think they can get away with it." "Sometimes, it takes many different people who may not normally get along to join together to stop the bully before he takes everything". I then asked Dad why he said "he" and he said that usually bullies are men. "oh" I said and before I could ask why, Dad said "I don't know why...just the way it is." He seemed tired of me asking questions and Mr. Grady would say that when your interviewee is tired of questions you ask one more "wrap-up"question and then say thank you. "Dad. Are we greedy?" I asked, and Dad just looked like he was in pain, but took a deep breath and said "Maybe we are a little son, but we don't take anything that isn't ours to take". "No, I meant our country." i said. Now Dad looked really in pain and he just looked at me and said "I don't know son, maybe we are. Can we go home now?" and I shook my head yes.

2006-01-29T16:25:00.000-08:00

Uncle Don sent me this picture of Cousin Thomas who lives in New York State. Cousin Thomas is a lawyer and Grandpa Jem's first cousin. He is also the son of Great Uncle Marek Buckheister, who is Great-Grandpa Fredric's brother. I am still trying to get everyone straight so that I can finally make a complete family tree by the end of this ancestor project. Cousin Thomas Buckheister was a basketball player in college and went on to law school at Ohio State University in the early 1960's. Uncle Don said that he was a really good basketball player, but broke his left leg in his last season and that kept him from playing in the NBA. The last time Uncle Don talked to Cousin Thomas was when he called to wish him a happy 70th birthday last year. I wrote back asking Uncle Don for his number so that I could find out more about him.

School is still keeping me busier than ever and I found a lot of interesting information about the Mayans yesterday at the library. Early Mayans developed one of the first complex calenders that was astronomy-based and they developed a hieroglyphic writing system. As many as 350,000 Mayans still live in present-day mexico, mostly on the Yucatan peninsula which surprised me because I thought they were all gone like other civilizations. I guess Mrs. Butcher telling me to look for a Mayan ancestor may not be as hard as I first thought. I wrote Donna asking for help with this part and she hasn't written back yet.
Gretchen gave me good news (sort of) when she told me this week that she is staying for the rest of this semester, which ends in April, but that her Mom wants to move after that. I felt glad that she was staying, but kind of sad that she might eventually leave for good. The news made me feel more sad than anything I guess, but she said that I shouldn't be too sad because her Mom might change her mind about leaving because "she always changes her mind" Gretchen said. Gretchen then put her hand on my arm to make me feel better and I did feel better. I also felt something else that I didn't expect and I can't really explain it. Her touching me made me feel scared, but really close to her like I wanted to touch her too. I was confused and when I looked up and into her eyes, i could see that she was really confused and maybe a little scared too. She then quickly moved her arm away and she turned red and seemed embarrassed. She got up fast and said that she had to go because her Mom was going out and she had to watch her little brother and she was already late. I felt like talking about this with Dad but I didn't know how to say it so I didn't. I will email Cousin Bruce and tell him to read todays post and hopefully after he reads this line he will help me understand what happened.

2006-01-18T19:26:00.000-08:00

The newspaper has been keeping me busy for the past week and we are looking into getting it online soon which is giving Mr. Grady an "ulcer". Nothing ever seems to go right on the computer these days and we are lucky to even get on the internet. Mr. Grady says it is because we live away from the big cities and that the school needs faster modems. I guess it will have to do for now.
Earlier this week George Davison got suspended for the fourth time and he now has to work from home for the rest of the semester or he may go to another school. It is the first student to get the stay-at-home punishment this year and he probably wishes he didn't pull David Coogan's pants down at lunch yesterday. Poor David was so embarrassed that he dropped his tray of food and then forgot it was on the ground (I guess) and then slipped in it and fell right into Rebecca Simmons lap. Everybody was laughing hysterically except Gretchen's friend Beth who tried to help him, but unfortunately she also became part of the mess on the floor and in Rebecca's lap. Grandpa said that it sounded like an episode of the "keystone Cops", which I guess was an old sitcom or something. I asked if it was like the show "Cops" and he just snorted and said "only if you shot the show in England". I gave up any chance of understanding and just nodded my head. So, the good thing to come out of poor David and Rebecca's very bad day is that George won't be bothering me anymore at school and it is just a matter of time before he is not allowed at church anymore either, which is probably what he is aiming for.
I talked on the phone over the weekend with Aunt Cindy's sister Donna and she said that she would help me with my project on the Mayan People of Early Mexico (which is its title) and Ms. Ramsey, who is now Mrs. Butcher since she was married during the winter break, said it was ok as long as I do the research and that I should try to find someone who can trace their roots back to Mayan people and interview them. "What about Jorge?" I said. Jorge works at the movie theater in Bakersfield and he and I have become good friends since I go there as often as Dad will drive me. "That's fine if he knows that he has Mayan ancestors", Mrs. Butcher said.
I now have way too much work to do and it seems like I don't have time to write about anything but dead people or relatives who are still alive. Mr. Grady suggested that I try setting aside time right after school to just "free-write" where I just write anything that comes to mind even if it doesn't make sense. "Thats great!" i said and he then said that I don't even have to worry about punctuation. He also says that it may take a while to learn how to just "let it flow", but that I should keep doing it no matter what. So, I started already when I got home and maybe I'll try it now for my blog. Here goes nothing...
i wore my socks inside out and they smell bad even though they look better and i want to keep typing fast but i cant type as fast as i write so maybe this is better for writing in my journal except tha i don't worry about grammar and spelling any,more which is fun and i am trying not to look at the screen while i type and my mom is calling me because it is time to feed the dogs and other animals and i told her that i am busy andf she is coiming down the hall so i better stop even though i can't and wish i could go onb all night lkike this ....ok Mom, sorry.

2006-01-09T19:12:00.000-08:00

I started back at school today and it was really great to see everyone, especially Gretchen who I only saw once during vacation because she went to New Mexico and Colorado to see family. She told me that her Mom is thinking about moving back to New Mexico because she hates her job here and can't find anything better. I was very upset when I heard this and asked Gretchen what she thought and she seemed to upset to think (or talk) about moving again. She told me a couple of months ago that she wishes she could stay in one place for just one whole school year, but that her Mom is a 'wanderer' who gets bored of places very quickly. I told my Mom this and she looked sad for me, but she said "maybe Gretchen's Mom will come to her senses". "I hope so", I said. Anyways, it kind of ruined my first day back to school, but Gretchen and I talked during lunch and she made me feel a little better, but mostly she was a little surprised that I cared so much and I think it actually made her feel good too. We shared an ice cream bar (our favorite thing to do) and I told her about Minnesota and my family there. She told me about New Mexico and seeing old friends who missed her and want her to move back, which made me unhappy again, so we stopped talking and just finished the ice cream. "Sometimes it is ok not to talk", as Grandpa likes to say (which is strange for an actor).
Dad tried to get my mind off of things when I got home by giving me a picture of him from a magazine advertisement he did in the 1990's. It made me laugh a bit because Dad was skinnier then and seemed a lot younger. "It is amazing what a camera can do" said Dad and I told him that it is a good place to start for my ancestor project this semester; That and Grandpa Jessie and Mom's family. He said that it took all day to shoot this one picture because they kept making him change his shirt and hat because no one could agree about what color he should wear or whether he should wear a long-sleeve shirt or a short sleeve shirt. They even tried using different backgrounds and when Dad received the magazine in the mail it turned out to be black and white. "It figures" Dad said, "They waste more time and money bickering about color and they end up not using any". Dad still does modeling work and occasionally does "voice-overs", but now he has gotten more into working with community groups that help protect the land from "greedy people". Dad says that his "community work", as he calls it, has hurt his ability to get "commercial" work because business people are starting to realize that Dad is speaking out against some businesses and it makes him less of a "rugged cowboy that just stomps on everything". I didn't really understand this, but I guess it seems like two different things to help the community and also to help sell pants and boots, but I don't know why he can't do both. "It is a little tricky", Dad said, "but you'll understand someday". I hate it when people say that because it is not enough for me or perhaps I was still upset because of what Gretchen told me, but I kind of snapped "Just try to explain it better!" i said. Dad gave me a look like he was going to send me to my room, but stopped and said "Let me explain it so you'll understand better", which surprised me. He said that the people who pay him to sell tires or western clothes hire him because he is the son of a famous cowboy movie star and that "rural" people will buy the products not because they are "good quality at a good price", but because a famous cowboy or son of a famous cowboy uses them. "I understand that part" I said. Then he said that "cowboys aren't supposed to care about the environment or anything for that matter...except maybe pickup trucks and the flag". This sounded really strange to me because "cowboys are always outside" I said. Dad just shook his head and said "I know son, but things in the world don't always make sense". That seemed like the best way to explain my whole day in general. At least we are having cheeseburgers for dinner.
"Rural" means "in, relating to, or characteristic of the countryside rather than the town" and its only use listed is "the rural backdrop was filmed in Georgia".

2006-01-03T17:27:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! Mom and I made it back from Minnesota last night and it is good to be home. It was also good to see Grandpa at the airport with Dad, which means his back is better or at least good enough to ride in a car for an hour and a half. Minnesota was fun and it wasn't too cold, but there was enough snow to go sledding with my cousins at Uncle Ronnies house. We spent new years eve at Aunt Gloria's house with all of the family including Grandma Sylvia who had a hard time staying up till midnight. Mom says that she usually goes to bed by 8:30 so it was tough for her. My cousin Katie kept tapping Grandma on the knee to keep her awake until finally Aunt Cindy yelled at her to stop. We then drank cider at midnight because it looked like champagne, but the adults were drinking real champagne and seemed really happy to be together, even Mom and Aunt Cindy seemed to get along ok.

I talked for a little while with Aunt Cindy's younger sister Donna who had flown in from San Francisco and who is not married because she is "too busy" studying cultural anthropology at the University near San Francisco (which I forgot the name of) to meet anyone. I asked her what "cultural anthropology" was and understood it as a study of humans and their customs, but decided to look it up anyways. It is "the comparative study of human societies and cultures and their development" and there was no use listed in the book, so you will just have to make one up. She particularly enjoys studying people of early Mexico and what things they liked and believed in. Donna lent me a small book about early people called Mayans that were very religious and performed many ceremonies and sacrificed animals and sometimes people for the gods that they believed in. This was confusing for me because I always thought there was just one God, but Donna said that some religions believe in many gods. I am excited about reading the book she gave me and hopefully can earn credit for reading it at school, which starts next week. Donna was very smart and also funny and I hope that after I read the book that I can talk about Mayans with her sometime since she doesn't live to far away. She said that it is her last year of graduation school and that she has been in school for almost 20 years if you count kindergarten through 12th grade and I asked her if she ever gets sick of it and she said "no" that she really enjoys learning new things about people and history. She said that learning history helps us to avoid making the same mistakes today, especially when it comes to "conflict" between countries or groups of people. I said that I had heard that before, but not sure where, "probably in history class" she said, and I said "probably, but I am not sure". She then said that many people in power forget what history teaches us and that is why we always have war. "I wonder if cousin Mat would agree" I thought. So, I have something to tell my history teacher at school and she will probably tell me to do a project on Mayans for the semester and maybe I can talk Donna into helping me with it. That wouldn't be too bad.

2005-12-27T14:43:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays!

Just a quick note to wish everyone a happy holidays and a happy new year. Tomorrow, Mom and I are going to Minnesota to visit family. Dad is staying behind to care for Grandpa who is still in some pain after stumbling down the front porch steps. He was in bed for most of Christmas day and yesterday also. I am excited to see my Uncle Ronnie and his family again and my Aunt Gloria and her family and Grandma Sylvia. The temperature there right now is 32 degrees which isn't as bad as last year when it was around zero degrees at night. Unfortunately, my Grandma sold the house with the pond when Grandpa Jessie died, but Uncle Ronnie has a backyard with a hill nearby so that we can go sledding. I got lots of clothes for christmas and a game called "the sims" for my computer. I gave Grandpa the first edition of my ancestor report printed on really nice paper and put into a leather binder with our initials on it. He seemed to like it a lot and later I saw him laying down sleeping with it laying on his chest. I gave Dad a new pair of cuff links that Mom suggested I buy, but I didn't give him an edition of my report, which he didn't seem to mind, because most of the report so far has been about Grandpa Jem and I told him that I was going to write more about him next semester as well as Grandpa and Moms family. He said that it is ok and that his life hasn't been as exciting as Grandpas and I was a little surprised to hear this because I know that Dad is involved in many projects about the land and water use in California. Ok maybe movies are more exciting, but I plan to find out some stories from Dad that will be just as funny and exciting like the one about his friend climbing the goalposts naked.
I want to also say that I went to see King Kong and I liked it a lot. The computer animation was really good and the ending was sad, but overall I gave it a 7 out of 10. One thing I didn't like was how long it was and Jack Black who kept making his goofy comedy face, but Naomi Watts was very beautiful and seemed to really like king kong even though he wasn't real. Btw (whichs means by the way), my new rating system for movies had to change because Dad usually drops Tom and I off since we're 13 now so I can't rate the movies based on when my Dad falls asleep anymore. I will try to write again from Minnesota but we are only staying until Monday so I don't know if there will be time since I will be sledding and having snowball fights most of the time.
See you all in 2006!

2005-12-17T15:46:00.000-08:00

I am enjoying the time off from school and I have found time to start reading "The Big Sky" and to see some movies. I received a birthday card last week from my Aunt Shelley who lives in Washington state and she wrote about her dog named Buddy that won second place at the dog show. I guess it won the ribbon not because it is a handsome dog but because it could "retrieve" a dead duck really fast in a pretend hunt. I had only heard of dog shows like the one on television so this was new to me. According to Aunt Shelley, Buddy has a really good sense of smell and his kind of dog is known for that (which is a black labrador). I wrote her back thanking her for the card and I wrote about my ancestor project that I started and asked her if she could write back with some stories and maybe a picture of Buddy. I showed Grandpa her card and the only thing he said was "A little late". I said that last year she didn't even send one so it is better than nothing and Grandpa just shrugged his shoulders.
I got an A on the first draft of my ancestor project and Miss Ramsey liked my stories a lot, but would like for me to write more about My Mom's side of the family, the Michaels. I said that I will be going to Minnesota right after Christmas with my parents to visit my Moms side of the family and hopefully will write down more stories. My Mom did tell me one story that I put into my report about my Grandpa Jessie and his pond-hockey parties. My Mom grew up in a house with a pond in the backyard and in the winter, Grandpa Jessie would throw parties where many of the neighbors would bring over their skates and the men would play hockey while the women would cheer and cook hamburgers. One winter that was warmer than usual, the neighborhood men came over to play but no one was quite sure if the ice was frozen enough yet. "So, everyone just stood around drinking beer and staring at the ice" said Mom. Some of the men started to get drunk and a couple of them decided to test it out anyways, so they put on their skates and started "slapping around the puck" when a loud cracking sound was heard. Everyone froze (pardon the pun) and the guys on the skates stopped skating when Grandpa Jessie yelled "GET OFF THE ICE!!" But grandpas friend Bob who had drank too many beers decided to keep skating and yelled back "It's just settling!" My Mom was only ten at the time but she remembers vividly the look on Grandpa Jessies face when Bob refused to come off the ice. He was so angry that he ran out onto the ice and grabbed Bob by the hood of his sweatshirt and started dragging him off when they both fell to the ice and the ice cracked again. Everone was really nervous and someone threw a rope onto the ice. Grandpa Jessie grabbed it and Bob and people started pulling them towards the edge of the pond when they fell through the ice. Then because they had ahold of the rope they ended up pulling 3 more people into the pond with them including Bob's wife. Luckily their was enough people left to pull everyone out one by one and "Bob had the hang-over of his life" Mom said as she laughed out loud.
This weeks word is "Retrieve" and it means "get (something) back; regain possession of; (of a dog) find and bring back (game or an object)" and an example of its use "Grandpas neighbors had to retrieve him and Bob from the pond".

2005-12-14T14:34:00.000-08:00

2005-12-08T20:31:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is the last day of school before winter break and I am busy trying to finish the first draft of my ancestor report and after tomorrow I will have more time to post stories to the blog. Someone suggested to me (I think it was Gretchens friend Beth) that I take more pictures with a camera because it will help to illustrate my recent stories, but I told her about how my writing teacher suggested that I put only a few (like I have) so that I learn to illustrate stories using words so that readers can create the story in their head. Mr. grady said that a great writer has to learn how to "create a vivid" story by including details and "illustrative" words rather than too many pictures which limit the readers imagination. He said that it is ok to include pictures of certain characters so that it helps "spark" the readers imagination, like in newspaper stories, or to use occasional colorful illustrations, like the one of my Grandpas hat, but pictures can also mislead people by giving too little account of a story that only words can fully give. A picture is only a very short period of time (less than one second) and sometimes stories happen over many minutes, hours, days or even years. An example of what he is saying can be found by just picking up a book and looking at the cover. Some books have a photo or a drawing on the cover and some do not, but the ones that do, like "The Big Sky" by A.B. Guthrie, Jr.(the picture above), help the reader to start to imagine what the story could look like, but it is up to the reader to make up the rest. I also told Beth that I have trouble with cameras because they always break when I touch them. I brought home a video camera from school recently to videotape the house, the horses, and hopefully to sneak a shot of grandpa and when I turned it on the camera went "haywire" (a word I heard on the Wallace and Gromit movie which was great). "Haywire" means "erratic; out of control, from the use of hay-baling wire in makeshift repairs". "her imagination had gone haywire" is another example of its use (besides with the video camera). Grandpa said that it was because I pointed it at his face, but I said it was because I touched it or maybe because I discovered that I had put the tape in backwards, either way, I forgot to mention it to Miss Cataline, the equipment officer. I guess that cameras and I don't get along and I decided to take Mr. Gradys advice and stick to writing.

The first part of my ancestor report talks about Grandpa and how he legally changed his name to Bigsky after moving to California and being "disowned" by my grandparents. "Disown" means "refuse to acknowledge or maintain any connection with" and its use is "Howard's rich family had disowned him because of his marriage." (Thats two words for today for those keeping score) He was inspired by the book that I mentioned earlier, "the Big Sky" by A.B. Guthrie and he read it on the train ride out to California. It was written in 1947 and the main character is named Boone Caudill. I asked Grandpa why he didn't change his name to Caudill or Boone and he said that he wanted to keep his same initials since he liked being called "JB" in high school and he didn't like Boone because it was too much like Daniel Boone. I found an old copy at the library and plan to read it during the winter break. Mr. Grady talked about another book written a long time ago called "Don Quixote" (he had to write it down for me) and about how similar it is to some of the old westerns like "the Big Sky" even though it was written over 40o years earlier. He said that it is difficult to read and it is 1000 pages long so he said to wait till high school to read it. "O-K" I said as if I was about to try to read 1000 pages of anything and said that I will try to remember it, but seeing the initials DQ made me think of Dairy Queen so then I talked him into taking the whole class out for ice cream to celebrate a great semester. He agreed and before long I was eating a banana split blizzard and ate more red cherries than anyone and was feeling sick when Mr. Grady said "be careful what you do around other journalists before your eating frenzy winds up in the next Red Hill Reporter". "I'll remember that also", i said and I wiped my face and we went back to school.

2005-12-01T20:49:00.000-08:00

Today is my 13th birthday and we had a party at school in writing class and my Mom made me a cake with aliens on it. I also got some nice presents and some balloons that were in my room when I came home from school. My favorite present was a telescope from my parents that I can't wait to try out. Gretchen gave me a t-shirt with Alf on it (she knows that I like Alf) and Grandpa gave me an old hat that he had to "wrangle away" from the Hopalong Cassidy museum in Wichita. It was supposed to eventually go in the new Jem Bigsky and singing cowboy museum in Grandpas hometown, but he decided that to honor my interest in his history that I should have it. "You are interested in history for the right reason and not just for money", Grandpa said, "so you should have it". The hat is one that he wore in three different movies making it his favorite and he considered it his lucky hat. The first time he wore it was when he went to eat at a diner in Culver city and that is where he met Grandma. She was a waitress there and she accidentally spilled coffee on the seat right next to the hat and some of the coffee got on the bottom of the back brim. The stain was too small "for any movie director to notice", but it was big enough that he would see it and he would be reminded of Grandma. He had mistakenly given it to the museum in Wichita and didn't have the nerve to ask for it back, but when the new museum in Missouri wanted some of Grandpas things that Grandpa thought it was a good time to ask for it back. It doesn't really fit me, but I will hang it on my wall above my computer. I guess it was a pretty good birthday and Cousin Bruce said that now that I am an official teenager that I can go see PG-13 movies and swear at my friends. I said that sounds like a pretty damn good idea and tomorrow after school Tom and I are going to see Harry Potter without our parents. Gretchen is only 12 so she can't go, but I've promised to take her to see Wallace and Gromit on Saturday. By the way, I hope because 13 is an unlucky number that I don't have an unlucky year. People have told me that it is often the worst year of your life because everything changes very fast inside your body and nothing seems the same from day to day. I wasn't to happy to hear this, but I guess that if 13 is unlucky than I just have to start telling people my age in months, so today I turned 156 months old. Now, I can't wait until I turn 192 so that I can drive.

2005-11-25T12:21:00.000-08:00

My Uncle Ronnie and his family are here visiting from Minnesota and are leaving tomorrow. Yesterday we had a very big thanksgiving dinner with turkey, stuffing and lots of other food. Uncle Ronnie is a chef at a restaurant and made a very delicious pumpkin pie for desert. Uncle Ronnie is my Mom's brother and he has a wife named Cindy and two daughters, My cousin Katie and cousin Samantha. Samantha is one year older than me and Katie is only 9. They are both very funny and like to giggle when Uncle Ronnie tells a story. My Dad and Ronnie seem to get along well, but my Mom and Aunt Cindy don't seem to like each other very much because of something that happened when they were kids growing up in Minnesota. No one talked about that story, but Uncle Ronnie told a different story about a rafting trip down the colorado river last summer when he and some friends put too much stuff in the boat and the boat "sprung a leak" and began to "sink like a stone" when they were rescued by another boat with four woman who turned out to be "lesbians". They knew this because one of Uncle Ronnies friends tried to ask her out for a date and was "rejected". Everyone at the dinner table laughed a lot when he said that, including me even though I didn't know why it was funny. After dinner we played a game called Braniac or something that Uncle Ronnie brought from Minnesota. I had to draw and act and even sang once as part of the game, but me and cousin Samantha still lost.

At school, we printed the final edition of the Red Hill reporter before winter break and it was shorter than the previous 2 editions because we ran out of time and had to leave some things out. It did have story in it by a girl named Jenny who wrote about her cousin Grant who fought in the Iraq war and died last year. He was only 20 years old and was a very good guitar player and liked to surf near Venice beach. He only joined the army because he could make enough money to go to college and now Jenny's uncle (Grant's father) is starting a scholarship in Grant's name so that someone else "with Grant's interests" can go to college and study music. Jenny brought a picture of him in and we put it on the front page of the paper. We also put in an "editorial" written by me and Tom (with help from Mr. Grady) about being thankful for being alive and for the freedoms we share, especially the freedom of speech which many people take for granted, and for the sacrifices people have made so that we can enjoy our freedom.

Happy Thanksgiving

2005-11-15T18:29:00.000-08:00

I found this picture in Grandpa Jems locker of my Dad and him at the very first Jem Bigsky carnival days in his hometown in Missouri. I guess since the first carnival was in 1978 (when my Dad was only 22) then this is a picture of them 27 years ago, although there was no date on the back. Grandpa and I talked about the first festival in his honor and what a good feeling it gave him. He said that it was "strange" because he hadn't been back for almost 10 years despite his parents and son, Don, living there. He said that he wasn't getting along with any of them at the time, but it turned out to be a good time to "reconcile" with his parents who, even though they didn't want him to go to California and never supported his career, were finally proud of him. His Dad, my Great grandfather, died 2 months later and his Mother, my Great grandmother, died in the Spring of the following year. My uncle Don and Grandpa Jem still weren't getting along very good even after the first carnival days and it wasn't until "the late 80s" that they began to talk more frequently. When I asked Grandpa why they didn't get along, he said that "it was just two stubborn men acting stubborn". Grandpa said that when Grandma died that Uncle Don and him talked for four hours about Grandma and "life" and since then they have gotten along "pretty well". When I asked why my Great grandparents and him didn't get along, he said that my Great grandfather was upset that he didn't stay and help out with the family business and instead had "crazy" dreams of being a singer and an actor. Grandpa Jem said that he just had no interest in running a hotel and "cleaning up after people", but Grandpa Jems first job when he got to California was working in a hotel since that is what he knew how to do. I laughed and said that it is what my writing teacher would call "ironic" and even funny and Grandpa Jem said that his father found it to be anything but funny. "He didn't talk to me for almost a year until I called him to tell him about my first real movie part", Grandpa said. Even then he'd barely acknowledge him and refused to come out for any of his movie premieres. "But when they saw me being honored at city hall at that first festival, my mother wept and the old man almost choked holding back his tears", said Grandpa describing that day in the photograph. He said that it was the best day of his life, "besides when the kids were born or the day when I married your Grandmother". I asked if they gave him a key to the city and he said "not then, but they unveiled a statue of me with 'old yeller' in my lap". That statue still sits on Main street near the park and it caused a stir one year when the town forgot to clean off the bird poop before the annual carnival days. "I was wrong to get so upset" said Grandpa, "those birds still treated me better than the movie critics in Hollywood".

Today's word is "reconcile" and it means, "restore friendly relations between; reunite" and its usage is "she wanted to be reconciled with her father".

2005-11-09T20:11:00.000-08:00

I am taking a break from my math homework and want to update everyone on what has been going on at the Lazy Eye ranch. I find that I have to take lots of breaks when I am doing my math homework since it usually gives me a headache. Some of it we have to do on the computer at school and we can finish at home by putting it on a compact disk. Grandpa keeps wondering why I never have a lot of books in my bookbag and I tell him that a lot of my school work is on the computer and with the internet and the schools learning program, we don't need a lot of books anymore. "Why don't they just make it so you can insert the information right into your brain?", Grandpa said. I said "those people only exist in outerspace movies and they are called cyborgs". Grandpa said that maybe he wouldn't worry about losing his memory if it could all just be stored on a disk and put into his head when he wants to remember something. I said that maybe it will happen someday and he said "lot a good that'll do me". I said that maybe he does have a machine of sorts already to store his memory into. He said "I am not touching that computer of yours" and I said "I am not talking about the computer exactly". Grandpa then paused and said, sounding frustrated, "Then what?" "Me!", I said in a louder voice than I was planning on using. "Oh", said Grandpa, "I guess you're right Jem", which made me stop because Grandpa Jem usually doesn’t call me by my name, our name. Usually he calls me “boy” or lately he has started calling me “young man”. I said that I want to have many stories of his to put into my project for school and for my blog (which are starting to become one and the same). He seemed happy about that and said "I guess I never did get down to writing those memoirs". I said that it is about time. Mom happen to overhear most of our conversation and she seemed like she was crying about something. I asked her if she was crying and she said "no my son, just chopping onions in the kitchen". "Oh" I said, kind of suspicious of her and went to the kitchen to get some water and realized that she actually had been chopping onions, so maybe she wasn't crying. I don't know.
So, with Grandpa finally convinced that my "pestering" him for stories will help him as much as me, we are planning a day together this weekend so that he can have some time to think of as many stories as possible for a few days and then spend a whole afternoon or more telling me them. I said that I will borrow a tape recorder at school or hopefully a video camera, which made him seem unhappy and he said "lets keep my face out of this". I said "what about the photos" and he said "the old pictures are ok, just not this old picture" as he pointed to his face.
"Its a deal", I said and we sat down for dinner. I could already tell that grandpa was thinking a lot during dinner because he hardly said anything. I just hope he was thinking of some good stories to tell.

2005-11-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

I have been really busy this week editing and helping to print out the second edition of the Red Hill Reporter and it is 2 pages bigger than the first one. The story Grandpa told me about him singing with Marlena Dietrich was in the paper along with the picture of him with his guitar "old yeller". The paper is all printed and it is delivered around school tomorrow. We are working on making the paper into something that can be read on the internet, but it may be awhile before the school gets its website going, Mr. Grady said. Hopefully by the time we return from winter break, which will be after the new year, anyone in the world can read the Red Hill Reporter. We only have one more edition before winter break so I am excited about that.
Gretchen wrote about her Great Aunt Romona that never lost at a card game called Michigan Rummy (even though she lived in Iowa) and would play men for money in every bar in town and take all their money. Gretchen even wrote about a how her aunt played for a Buick (some sort of big car) and won it on the last hand of the game from a famous Michigan rummy player named "Johnny Cats". She won so often that she was always accused of cheating, but no one ever caught her and some even threatened to kill her. She had to eventually stop playing in Iowa because the police were after her for illegal gambling and she moved out west in the 1970's and continued playing in places like Colorado and Arizona. She eventually died in Arizona while trying to make it to Mexico. Gretchen's grandma never could retrieve her sister's remains and only rumors remain about how she actually died, but Mr. Grady wouldn't let us print what those rumors were because they were very violent stories and as Mr. Grady says, "Rumors are not facts". So I want to know what the dictionary says about that. A "rumor" is "a currently circulating story or report of uncertain or doubtful truth; gossip" and an example of its use "rumor has it that he will take a year off". I wonder what makes a report become more truthful and less "uncertain"? I guess I will have to ask Mr. Grady about that. I also would like to know if anyone reading this knows the answer to that question. He did mention to me the other day that maybe I should ask more questions directed to the people reading my blog in hopes that they'll respond and make my blog more "interactive". I guess I'll wait till next time to look that word up. So, I guess I hope more people write comments, but I understand if you don't have time. Either way I'll just keep writing ...
Jem

2005-10-27T21:38:00.000-07:00

I am trying to take my history teachers advice and include more pictures on my blog. It helps that we are working on our ancestor project in Miss Ramseys class this semester that I need pictures for. I found another old photo of Grandpa Jem that he had in his "memorabilia" locker. I asked him if he every worries about forgetting the combination and he said that its a rare day that he remembers it but that he figures that on the days he remembers than its a sign that he should go through the locker before he forgets. He then wrote down the numbers and gave it to me to keep for him and that made me feel good that he trusts me. I asked him if I could go through it whenever I want and he said "yup, but you better wear a dust mask". He knows how dust bothers my allergies and just holding this old photo made me sneeze.
This photo is of Grandpa and his guitar that he named "old Yeller". I asked if it was named for the movie about the dog "old yeller" and he said that it was mostly because it was yellow and that most singing cowboys name their guitar after a woman, but since he wanted to be different it made sense to name it after a dog. He said that now maybe he is the "old yeller" and I couldn't help but lol (laugh out loud in case you forgot). I asked if he still would sing and he said that sometimes in the shower when his voice is loosened by the hot water, he'll sing a few bars. He then told me a story about one time when he was on a movie set and was warming up his vocal chords when up walked a woman who told him that his voice was really nice and he turned around and it was Marlena Dietrich, who I guess was a famous movie star from Germany. Grandpa Jem just couldn't believe his eyes and how beautiful she was and how even though she must've been almost 60 that she was absolutely "stunning". He asked her if she would sing a few bars with him and she said that she would and they sang "You're the only star in my blue heaven", which is a Gene Autry song. Grandpa just stared into space for a few moments and then said "my voice never sounded as good as when I sang that one song". He then suddenly remembered how "old yeller" was eventually stolen in Kansas City and that it is good to see it again. I asked if there was any pictures of him and Marlena Dietrich and he said "no, and I never saw her again either". He went back to the set and told everyone what happened and no one believed him. He almost couldn't believe it either except that the "gaffer" overheard them singing and vouched for him and for his "own sanity".
The word for today is "gaffer" and it is "the chief electrician in a motion-picture or television production unit".

2005-10-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

My science class took a 2-day camping field trip to Joshua Tree national park this week. Tom and I were put in charge of cooking for our first night there and we made bean burritos with papas con queso (which means potatoes with cheese). We also learned about the Joshua Trees and other plants there. Some of the Joshua trees are hundreds of years old and they have a hard time growing because animals and birds eat them before they get to grow so the Joshua tree is now in danger. Also, a park ranger told us about the pollution from Los Angeles and how its effecting the plants there with too much nitrogen. They are really neat looking trees and some of them look like people. I also learned that the park is located in two different deserts - the Sonoran and the Mojave desert. We also got to see a Big horn sheep that climbing high on the rocks above us and we also saw a desert turtle. One of the students in our class thought it was a rock until our teacher said it was a turle in its shell. Eventually he peeked his head out to see if we had left yet and then quickly went back in his shell.

There was another science class there from San Diego and they were camping nearby. We talked with some of the students from their school and even shared some of our food. We also all volunteered together to help pickup garbage around the park and the campground. Tom found an old cowboy hat and Cindy from our class found an old Nintendo gameboy that didn't work. I didn't find anything interesting, but I did talk for a long time with a girl named Lisa from the school in San Diego who was very cute and a lot of fun to talk to. She liked to laugh and giggle a lot as we talked about books and movies and about her Dad who is a Genomic Scientist or something like that. I asked what that is and she tried to explain it too me, but I don't think she knew either. So, I decided to look it up in the old dictionary. "Genomics" is "the study of the complete set of genetic material of an organism" and an example of its use that I found during a search of the word is "The Cat Genome Project was announced along with plans to sequence the genomes of eight other mammals: the elephant, the orangutan, the shrew, the hedgehog, the guinea pig, the tenrec, the armadillo and the rabbit." I will have to ask my science teacher Miss Parker more about it on Monday.

2005-10-17T21:37:00.000-07:00

My Dad, Gretchen and I had a great time at the movies on Saturday. We went to see "Charlie and the Chocalate Factory" at the movie theater and even though Dad had 3 cops of coffee, he fell asleep with 30 minutes left. Oh well, I couldn't concentrate on the movie anyways because Gretchens foot was touching mine through most of the movie. It had some funny parts and really good special effects so I guess I liked it, but every time Gretchen laughed I couldn't hear anything going on in the movie for a really long time. Afterwards, we went out for dinner and ice cream and then we drove Gretchen home. The only thing that was uncomfortable is when Dad asked Gretchen about her Dad and she had to tell him about how her Dad died. I guess it was my fault because i forgot to tell him about her Dad, but Gretchen said that its ok because shes used to it. Gretchen also gave me that picture of her when she was 7 (or maybe shes 8, I can't remember).

I talked to Cousin Mat yesterday and we talked briefly and he seemed somewhat excited by my ancestor project and he said he would send me some pictures soon with stories. He did say that many of the von Schamann family left Austria and Germany after the second world war and some cousins and uncles died fighting for the nazis. I was a little upset by this but he also said that some other members of the family including a Bucheister (different spelling) left before the war because they didn't agree with the nazis and Hitler. I told him that Grandpa Jems parents came here before Grandpa was born because of the first world war and eventually settled in Missouri. Then I said that I think it is strange to have to leave your home country because of a war and that I could understand how some would decide to stay and fight even though they don't completely agree with the war or are uncertain about what its for. He said that it is important to fight for your country because it is your only home, but it made me confused because in history class we talked about the civil war in America and how people fought against each other. "War doesn't always make sense" cousin mat said and I had to agree with that. I asked him why he is a bodybuilder and he said it was because he started lifting weights with his friends when he was a kid in austria and he liked it because it was challenging and made him feel good about himself. I wanted to ask him about steroids and whether he has taken them, but I was a little afraid by what he might say. In science class we have to pick a topic to research this quarter and I have picked steroids and its effect on people. Maybe I'll ask cousin mat to help me with the project and that might be better then asking him if he took them. He is afterall really big and kind of scary. Gretchen only laughs when she sees the pictures of mat because she thinks its funny that he doesn't seem to be changing very much during the 3 pictures of him. "I guess he seems to be getting more red" i said which only made her turn red (like her hair) when she tried not to choke on her french fries.
Amy (the only one who leaves good comments) has reminded me that I need a word of the week so I guess I'll choose the word "digital", which I heard someone say about the special effects in the movie. It means "relating to or using signals or information represented by discrete values (digits) of a physical quantity, such as voltage or magnetic polarization, to represent arithmetic numbers or approximations to numbers from a continuum or logical expressions and variables". Yikes. The only example of its use is "digital television". Maybe you can help me here Amy.

2005-10-12T20:44:00.000-07:00

My Dads friend is a photographer and took this picture of me 4 years ago at the county rodeo. I hung on longer than my friend Tom, but I didn't win because Stewert Jacobs hung on longer and even managed to tackle the animal. I showed it to Gretchen and she liked it a lot and she promised to bring in a picture of her when she was young.
Our first edition of the Red Hill Reporter came out and it was a big success. All the students and even some of the teachers read it during free time and many people were laughing at the first ancestor stories. My movie review of the Fantastic 4 was great and I can't wait to write another one. My rating system is based on how long it takes my Dad to fall asleep during the movie, which everyone laughed at because the Fantastic 4 was 45 minutes which is actually pretty good because my Dad falls asleep sometimes during the first 30 minutes of the movies that I take him to. Dad said that he thinks I should ask Gretchen to join us next time we go the the movies and I was a little shy but I asked her today and she said "yes". So, we are going to the movies this Saturday in town. I told Dad to drink some coffee before we go so that he doesn't embarrass me by snoring in front of Gretchen. He asked if that would throw off my rating system and I said that I will maybe use a new system where its based on how many cups of coffee it takes to get him through the whole movie. "You are one clever boy" Dad said. I can't wait for Saturday.

2005-10-07T21:32:00.000-07:00

It was a strange week at my school as George tried to fight me twice because of what happened with the chair. On Tuesday, he followed my outside after school with his friend John Ducinsky, but my Dad showed up just in time to pick me up. On Thursday, George cornered me during free time, but luckily a teacher saw what was happening and George got taken to the directors office. I had to go in also afterwards and explain again what happened at free time and about the chair incident. I guess I wasn't as convincing as I was with Mrs. Ramsey and the dean called my parents last night. I told my parents exactly what happened and they weren't sure exactly what to say, but since I tried to hurt someone, I am not to watch television for one week. I guess that is ok because I don't watch that much tv, except for my favorite show which is the Drew carey show.

I guess this was a good week to bring my pictures of cousin Mat to school because maybe George will leave me alone now that he knows I have a bodybuilder cousin. I also found a funny picture of me at the county rodeo when I was 7 and I'll put that on the blog next time. I also have some pictures of Grandpa Jem that I am going to scan tomorrow and use those in my ancestor report. We have to make a family tree with the pictures and start with ourselves at the bottom of the page and work our way up as far as we can go. It is really cool because I have talked with Uncle Don and with my Aunt Gloria and they said they would mail me some pictures and hopefully with some information about those relatives.
Cousin Mat definitely looks like he is a relative except that he is much bigger than all of the men in our family. Cousin Bruce gave me Mat's phone number and I am going to call him tomorrow to find out about some of our Austrian relatives that either live here or are still in Austria. I don't know much about Austria except that they speak German there and it was where Adolf Hitler was born. So, I decided to see what the dictionary says. Austria is "a republic in central Europe; pop. 8,100,000; capital, Vienna; official language, German". I am also going to include a map so that I know exactly where it is. I guess I still want to know from cousin Mat why people would leave there and come to America instead.

2005-10-01T21:51:00.000-07:00

I met a new girl at school today. Her name is Gretchen Rodgers (I think thats how you spell it) and she just started at our school earlier this week. She joined our history class and I heard her speak for the first time yesterday. She is kind of shy, but is very beautiful and has red hair. I don't know why they call it red because its really orange. That is the only thing I could think to say to her and she just looked at me and smiled politely. I then asked her where she is from and she said "New Mexico". I told her that I rode through there once on a family trip and she smiled again politely. I thought maybe I was boring her and said that it was nice to meet her, but when our teacher made us pick a partner to tell one story from our family history project she looked at me and smiled politely again, so I got up to sit down next to her and asked if she would be my partner and she nodded her head yes. Then I smiled and before I could sit down George Davison bumped me out of the way and asked Gretchen if she wanted to be his partner. I was so mad, but couldn't do anything but look at Gretchen and hope that she would tell him no. She looked at him and then at me and seemed afraid to say anything when the strangest thing happened. George was about to sit down on the chair that I was about to sit down on and just before his butt hit the chair I pulled it away and he went crashing to the ground. The whole class became very quiet and all of a sudden as we were all looking at George laying on his backside I heard the sound of someone trying to hold in laughter. I looked over and it was Gretchen. Once she realized that now everyone was looking at her she stopped and looked at her feet. I backed up thinking that George was going to stand up and hit me and instead he looked really embarrassed and even seemed like he wanted to cry. The whole class was really surprised because George is usually a bully, but Mrs. Ramsey the history teacher helped George up and sent him to the school nurse before he started crying. Mrs. Ramsey asked what happened and I figured I was going to get in trouble, but somehow I said that I had asked Gretchen to be my partner and she said yes and was about to sit down when George tried to steal my seat and he missed. Mrs. Ramsey asked Gretchen if this was true and she looked up and nodded her head yes. That was it. No one else said anything and some people even looked at me and smiled as if I was some hero. But I felt kind of bad and was surprised that I would do something like that to hurt someone. In one way it made me feel good to stand up for myself, but at the same time I was feeling guilty. I was a little confused when I sat down and started to ask Gretchen the questions that Mrs. Ramsey had given us, but once I heard Gretchen speak about her family and how sad it was that her father had died when she was five, I forgot all about george davison and the chair.
Next week we have to start bringing in pictures of our family and discuss two stories with the class. I just hope that Mrs. Ramsey makes us keep the same partner.

2005-09-27T21:34:00.000-07:00

Cousin Bruce brought a couple of pictures with him this weekend and said that this picture is a "promotional" picture of him at the studio where they film his yoga show. He just started this show in July and he still is promising to take me there one day when they are making his show. He said that it is going well and he is on 5 different stations around california, usually early in the morning. I said that now 3 of our family members have been on television since Dad does commercials and Grandpa Jem's movies have played on the Western channel before. Cousin Bruce says that actually 4 have been on TV because cousin Mat was on ESPN in a bodybuilding competition. He brought a picture of Mat, well actually 3 pictures of Mat, and I will put them on the blog next time. I asked him what yoga is exactly and he said something about "harmony and balance" and "purifying the body" and stuff like that but I decided to look it up in the dictionary anyways. Yoga is "a Hindu spiritual and ascetic discipline, a part of which, including breath control, simple meditation, and the adoption of specific bodily postures, is widely practiced for health and relaxation". Ascetic means "characterized by or suggesting the practice of severe self-discipline and abstention from all forms of indulgence, typically for religious reasons". An example of its use is "an ascetic life of prayer, fasting, and manual labor". "That doesn't sound very fun", I said and I asked Cousin Bruce if he lives like that and he said "not so severely". He did say that he often fasts, which he told me means not eating very much food for a few days in order to "clean out" his body. I said that I would miss eating too much, especially ho-hos, but that I might try yoga once to see how I liked it. He then showed me a couple of easy positions to try in order to help me wake up in the morning. I said "sure" and then tried them this morning and felt a little strange. Grandpa asked what I was doing and I told him that it was yoga positions that cousin Bruce showed me. Grandpa actually was speechless, but seemed to doubt its usefulness by the look on his face, but maybe considering the shape his back is in now, his silence may mean that he wishes he had taken better care of it when he was young and that there could be a very small chance that what I was doing in the living room might actually help me later in life. I still felt weird either way.

2005-09-22T21:47:00.000-07:00

Things are moving kind of slow on my ancestor project. Grandpa is having trouble again with his back so I have been afraid to ask him about our relatives. Cousin Bruce is coming to visit this weekend and I told him to bring the picture of our cousin that he met and one of himself since my report needs some pictures. He did say that our cousin from austria is named Mat and he is a successful weightlifter. I also asked my Dad and Mom about old pictures of the family and they have said that some are in the attic and some of my Mom's family are at her sisters. My Mom's Father, my Grandpa Jesse, passed away 4 years ago, but my Mom's Mother, my Grandma Sylvia is still alive and lives with my Aunt Gloria in Minnesota. I also have an Uncle Ronnie who lives not far from my Aunt and Grandma in Minnesota. I also have cousins from the Michaels side and they mostly live in the midwest. One of them, according to Mom, lives in New York City and is an artist. I hope anyone reading this isn't completely confused by all this. I am hoping that finding some pictures on both sides will help keep everyone straight.
I will be writing my first movie review for the newspaper this weekend also , but I am not sure what we are going to see yet. Dad promised to take me on Saturday afternoon at the theater in town. I really want to see the Fantastic 4 and hope it is still playing. We came up with a name of our newspaper on Tuesday, but really I guess it is the same name as last years paper though since no one could think of anything better. It is called the Red Hill Reporter named after the hill near our school.
On Tuesday Mr. Grady's cat followed him all the way to school. He came outside for a break during the morning and his cat was waiting for him. I guess Mr. Grady walks almost 2 miles to school some days when the weather is nice which is almost everyday because its california. I asked him why he does that and he says its the only way that he can wake up "without drinking 4 cups of coffee". So, he didn't notice it but his cat was following him all the way and since he didn't know what to do when he saw him there, we brought him inside the classroom. Digger, the cat, was a little frightened by everyone and just hid under Mr. Grady's desk. No one could stop giggling for the first 15 minutes of class so Mr. Grady decided to tell other stories about his cat instead and then told us all to write any funny pet stories we could think of in our writing journals. I thought of one about one of our dogs named lulu and it involved the dog getting muddy and running through the house. Grandpa was so angry and yelled "get that damn thing out of here!!". I guess lulu was too strong for the screen door and crashed right through. Lulu was a big dog that was "part shepherd and part something else big" as Mom put it. The house was a real mess, but I couldn't stop laughing. Well, time to finish my spanish homework before bed. Buenos Noches.

2005-09-16T20:24:00.000-07:00

I haven't gotten to post to my blog because I have been staying after school all week to help start our school's newspaper. The school bought 2 new computers and a printer for the writing and journalism class and I volunteered to help get it setup and to start to learn a program called Indesign. It is called a "layout" program because you lay out all the writing and the pictures before you print it out on paper. It was really exciting last night when we finally got the new printer to work with the new computers. For awhile it was printing the page sideways and then it would print it too small or too big and finally we just unplugged everything and started over. My teacher Mr. Grady was getting very upset at all the equipment and had to go outside to smoke a cigarette twice. Tom and I figured it out while he was out smoking his second cigarette. Mr. Grady came back in and said "ok from now on you guys are in charge of the computer." Tom and I looked at each other and laughed because just last year Tom and I both got our first computers and we didn't know much about them and now we are in charge of our first newspaper. I also get to write the movie reviews for the paper and since I have been practicing writing all summer, Mr. Grady made me the "editor". I told him that I really have trouble spelling and that the computer corrects my mistakes and he told me that it was ok and that editing is not all about spelling and grammer, but also about how "everything fits together like a puzzle". I said that I am good at puzzles.
I also have to do a project for social studies about my family's history and I thought that would be great idea for the newspaper if we did our first issue about the family history of the students and of the teachers at our school. Mr. Grady said that it was a very good idea and that perhaps we'll have enough room if we only include one interesting thing about the history of every person's family in the school. I said that it might be hard since there are 80 or so kids in the school, but he said that it can be a weekly part of the paper and that I should just start with the people in my social studies class which is only about 15. I also thought that maybe not every student has a family history that they can find out about and some students are adopted. Our teacher told the class that if we cannot find out much or if it isn't possible then we must write about their hero. I thought about that and wondered if having a hero is the same if you don't know that person. Like if your hero is a baseball player, but that you have never met that player? I guess I wonder what it would be like not to have any heros that are a part of my family. My Grandpa, Dad and Mom are all my heroes because they feed me and are always caring about me. I guess a baseball player or a rock star can't feed you or care for you so it must be hard to have them as your only heroes.
I told Dad and Grandpa about it and they said that they would help me, but that uncle Don is the real historian in the family and that I should call him too. I already know that our family came from austria and I also know that I have many cousins that either still live in Austria or have moved here recently. My Dad says that Uncle Don communicates with some of them and that Cousin Bruce also met one in Los angeles. I am looking forward to finding out all about not only the Buckheisters, but also my Mother's family, the Michaels.

2005-09-10T09:14:00.000-07:00

School was fun this week as I began 7th grade officially. There was some new kids that I have never met and a lot of my friends that I already know that decided to come back. My school is called an "alternative school" or some people call it a "charter school" and sometimes kids or their parents decide not to come back and go somehwhere else like the big school in town or the private school in the next town over. Mostly, people stay because the school is fun and we go on lots of trips in the big white van, but I hear some people don't like it or that we don't take enough tests to be a good school. I don't like tests so it is good for me, but Dad and Grandpa disagree about sending me to my school because Grandpa says school should be tougher and teach kids to "survive". Luckily, Mom and Dad don't agree with him and they think I am learning a lot there. The teachers always remind me to keep writing and they allow kids to talk about their lives and what troubles they have and that sometimes the best way to learn things is to leave the school and see it "with our own eyes". We also get to watch movies sometimes and I told my teacher about my Grandpa and he promised to show one of his movies in class sometime. I was really surprised and said that we could show it in history class because some of his movies are about real people and my teacher said it is more about "film history" and that is good enough. I told Grandpa about this and he laughed and said that he always knew he was "history" as long as its "living history". After that we talked about one of his movies in which he played a miner during the "gold rush" in San Francisco and that it was about a real person named Henry who liked to sing about finding gold and living in a city where everyone was after one thing. I said "gold?" and Grandpa said yes and he also said that someone should make the same kind of movie about Hollywood. I asked if there was a gold rush in Hollywood and he said slowly "there wasn't then but there is now". I asked if we could see it and he said "you see it all the time". I wasn't going to leave confused this time so I asked him what the heck he was talking about and he said while winking at me "movies my boy movies".

2005-09-06T19:27:00.000-07:00

Today was my last day of summer vacation and it seemed to go by really fast. I am still thinking about all the trips I took during the past month and will have plenty to say when the teacher asks me what I did on my summer vacation. I'll tell them all about how I went to Missouri and saw my Grandpa be the most popular person in his hometown and how everyone was talking to him about his movies he made and how they honored him with a carnival and a new museum. The museum will have lots of photographs and will show his movies on the weekends. They also will have a statue of him in a glass case and other movies and books about cowboys. I will also tell them about how we went to the grand canyon on the way back from missouri and how amazing it was to see such a big "crack in the earth" as Grandpa calls it. I will also tell people at school about my camping trip with my dad and cousin and about the trip to "the city of angels" to hear people talk about water and the colorado river. I can also talk about the trip I didn't get to take to the mountains because my Grandpas back wasn't well enough for him to travel. Grandpa was more mad than usual that the family had to stay home because of him, but we ended up still going to the labor day parade in town even though grandpa couldn't come. It rained during most of the parade and Dad and I got pretty wet because all the good spots under cover were taken. Dad didn't seem to mind too much and actually seemed to enjoy the rain even though our shoes still haven't dried yet.
So I guess I have probably too much to tell everybody at my school and I am sure I won't know exactly what to say and what not to say. Sometimes I think I tell people too many parts of the story that might not seem important to other people or even a big part of the story. Cousin Bruce says that details are good and I shouldn't be afraid to write about all of them and that even though sometimes people don't really like to listen to them they don't mind reading about them. I guess i don't understand that completely, but I will try to remember that tomorrow.
My word of the day is actually a word from last week when I went to Los angeles. I wrote in my journal as alocation, but it is spelled "allocation". It means "an amount or portion of a resource assigned to a particular recipient;allowance" and its use is "the efficient allocation of resources". I understand the allowance part. I think I will now go ask Dad for my weekly "allocation of resources".

2005-09-03T12:24:00.000-07:00

Another week of my summer vacation has gone by and I am actually excited about going back to school to see my friends next week. It has been really hot here this week and Grandpas back seems to be getting worse. It has made him and everyone else at the ranch a little grumpy. Dad has decided to cancel our annual trip to the mountains because of Grandpas health, but Grandpa is insisting we all leave tomorrow with or without him because as he says to my Dad, "you already paid for the cabin". So, we might leave later today or early in the morning tomorrow, but we might not go at all.
Meanwhile, (a word that cousin Bruce suggests I use to switch to another story), earlier last week, Dad, my friend Tom and I went to Los Angeles to attend a meeting of people who work in the government that talk about how much water people will have in big cities. There was people there from Las Vegas, Phoenix, Arizona, and other places. Dad is always talking about how there isn't much water where we live and that someday soon people will have to pay a lot of money for it. There were people outside of the building with signs that said "the people own the water" and other stuff like that and some were shouting things. I did learn a lot about the Colorado river when we went to the grand canyon on our way home from Missouri last month and learned even more in Los Angeles about it. My school toke a field trip last year to the Hoover Dam and now I understand how it helps save water for people so that they can live where there isn't much water and as Dad says, without it "folks in Phoenix wouldn't be able to keep their grass green". After a couple hours of those government people talking, Dad told Tom and I to go walking around inside the building because we were getting kind of bored, especially Tom who looked like he was going to start crying. We walked down the stairs and then talked with a security guard who didn't seem interested in the colorado river because I asked him about it and he just looked annoyed that we were talking to him. Then we started talking about movies and he seemed a little more friendly. His favorite movie is a movie called "Falling Down" about a guy who can't stand living in Los Angeles anymore and goes crazy. He said that he sometimes feels like that guy. I said to him maybe he should move to the country where there isn't so many people and he laughed. He said that he would get bored in the country because there is not much to do and both Tom and I looked at him funny and said there is a lot to do. The security guard named Dave didn't seem too sure about that and said "I wouldn't know what to do with all that fresh air. It would probably make me sick." Tom turned to me and whispered "Lets go back to the boring meeting, this guys weird." I said ok then shook Daves hand and wished him good luck. After the meeting, we went out for burgers and milkshakes and it seemed like finally Tom lost that look of pain on his face. When we got back to the ranch later that night, Grandpa and Mom were arguing about one of the horses and Dad had to calm them down. Grandpa took two red pills and I started to tell him about our day in Los Angeles and about the government people and the security guard named Dave and how hot it was there and about our burgers and milkshakes when I looked over and realized that Grandpa was sleeping. Mom looked over at us and said quietly "finally".

2005-08-29T22:55:00.000-07:00

Well my summer vacation keeps getting better. This weekend Dad, Cousin Bruce and I went camping an hour away from the ranch. I really like camping because I get to sit around the fire listening to Dad tell stories about his "wild" youth and then hear Cousin Bruce compare those stories with his own. Sometimes it seems like they forget that I am sitting there, but its ok because then they say things that Grandpa would yell at them for saying in front of me. Dad told a story about how he and some friends ran across his college campus naked and one of his friends got caught climbing up the field goal posts while the security guards tried to get him down by shaking it. Dad and the rest of his friends took Scott's (I think that was his name) clothes and ran back to their rooms. I guess Scott came down eventually and was put on "probation" (More on that word later). Cousin Bruce then told a story about how him and his friends went on a trip to Mexico and then he stopped and looked at me and said that they had a great time scuba diving and saw lots of colorful fish. Then Dad said that it was ok that I am getting old enough to hear real stories about "what men do at night in strange places". Cousin Bruce then was a little quiet but talked about how he met a girl there named Nidia and how he fell in love with her, but that she didn't speak english and all they could do was look into each others eyes and try to speak what little of each others language they knew. Cousin Bruce knew only one sentence from a song and repeated it over and over to Nidia "Tu eres la luz de mi vida". I said very excitedly that I knew what that meant from my spanish class because our teacher read a story to us about a boy and a girl who fall in love at the beach. It seemed like Cousin Bruce wanted to say more about it, but could only say that his friends teased him the whole ride home to college. He seemed to be thinking about Nidia even into the next day because he told me as we were fishing at a pond near the campground that he went to Mexico expecting to have lots of fun with his friends and that they were going to drink lots of beer and see lots of girls taking their clothes off, which he said they did, but the thing he always remembers more than any of that was his brief time with Nidia and how he will always be able to hear her voice and smell her "sweet breathe". I said that I hope I meet a girl like that and Cousin Bruce said that he is sure I will someday. I then said that if I go to Mexico that I will be prepared because I am learning spanish in school. Cousin Bruce said that sometimes people who like each other a lot speak a whole different language than Spanish and English. I then said to him "Like French" and he just smiled as big as I've ever seen him smile and said "yeah something like that".
Todays word is "probation" which means "the process or period of testing or observing the character or abilities of a person in a certain role, for example, a new employee." An example of is use is "for an initial period of probation, your manager will closely monitor your progress." That only made me wonder who my "manager" is. Dad said earlier today when I asked him that "your manager is me, your mother, your grandfather, and all your teachers". I said that I have a lot of managers to monitor me and he said that I was lucky and that some kids don't have more than one or two and that some don't have any at all. I was sad to hear that, but I guess it did make me feel pretty lucky.

2005-08-24T20:19:00.000-07:00

My Mothers name is Jane and people often call her "Lady Jane". She is a very nice Mom and always gets me things when it isn't my birthday. She can cook really well, but she also can take care of the horses and animals better than anyone. The horses seem to prefer it when Mom feeds and combs them. When we went to Missouri Mom had to stay behind to make sure everything got done well. We have people who come to help clean out the stables and to mow the front lawn, but Mom doesn't like to leave for too long because she wants to be sure things are done right, especially regarding the horses. Her favorite horse is called Jezebel and "she runs like the wind" says Mom. She gets up almost every morning to ride her except sometimes on sundays because of church. Mom told me that when she was a girl that she never really liked horses and always hated cleaning them and taking care of them which was very surprising for me to hear. She says that she was more of a "tomboy" and liked to play baseball and go bike riding with her friends. When Mom and Dad moved to the ranch before I was born, Mom didn't really care for the horses even then. I asked Dad what he thought about that and he said it was fine that he was sure that "she would naturally grow to love them as all city people who move to the country do". Mom said that it was a palomino named "Sam" that started her love for horses and Jezebel "finished the deal".
Mom now spends her time taking care of the horses and me and is also very involved with her many projects to help people "who grew up like me without much" as she says. She also has recently learned how to make ceramic objects that sometimes are useful and sometimes not. While we were gone she made a ceramic fish that is really beautiful and somehow always looks wet. She gave it to me to put on my bookshelf in my room. On the bottom it says "to my boy, don't ever stop swimming, love, Mom". I was unable to say anything and the room went quiet when Grandpa muttered "what the heck does that mean?" We all just looked at him and Dad without looking away from grandpa said "Jem, get grandpa his pills."
In honor of Mom, today's word is "ceramic" and it means "made of clay and hardened by heat", "from Greek keramikos". I read that to Mom and she said "sounds like a family trait to me".
Once again the boy is confused.

2005-08-21T17:21:00.000-07:00

This is a picture that Uncle Don lent me to put on my blog site. It is an old picture of him from 1975 that was in the local newspaper in his hometown in Missouri. Like Grandpa, Uncle Don wants to be remembered for how he looked when he was young. This picture was in the paper because Uncle Don had just graduated from college at "the top of his class". I asked him if that meant he got better grades than anyone and he said "yes". Uncle Don said that this picture helped him meet his first wife, my Aunt Brenda, Cousin Bruce's mom. She recognized him from the paper when he was walking through town and they started to date each other and then got married one year later. Uncle Don is well known for his walks around town as he likes "to get his news through first-hand experience". I asked him what he meant exactly and he said that he doesn't trust the local news, but instead would rather talk to people in the town to find out what is happening. People in town have nicknamed him "the mayor" because he likes to chat with people even though some people say that he is not always in a "pleasant" mood. I asked him if the real mayor does that and he said "only around election time".
Uncle Don is Grandpas oldest son and is older than his sister, my Aunt Shelley. My Dad is the youngest of the 3 children from my Grandpa and Grandma and he has wondered why he was named Jem Bigsky II and not my uncle Don. I asked Grandpa this and he said it was because Grandma didn't want to name any of the kids that name saying "it should stay in the movies", but Grandpa said that he finally convinced her right after Dad was born because they couldn't agree on anything else and "Grandma was too tired to argue".
My Dad says that people in town respect my uncle because he is the only Buckheister to return to Missouri and he is very helpful to people there. "A man should never forget where he came from" was something I overheard a man say one day at the carnival. I am not sure if he was talking about my family or not, but it was something that made me think about my uncle. My Grandpa and Uncle Don haven't always gotten along so good, but now they get along better. My Aunt Shelley rarely talks to my Grandpa or any of us really and both she and Uncle Don use the name Buckheister and both rarely come to California. Aunt Shelley lives in Washington state and as Dad says "she might as well live in Russia".

2005-08-19T15:26:00.000-07:00

I am finally back at the ranch after a long, but very exciting trip. Like my cousin said, my Grandpa had a bad week with his back and we almost were going to stay in Missouri for another week. Luckily my Grandpa feels better and we were able to drive a long way while he took lots of pain pills. He said some very funny things on the last day of the trip (yesterday), but some of it didn't make any sense. Right now he is at the doctors with dad and they hopefully will make him feel better. Usually when he goes to the doctors he comes home feeling worse, but has more pills to take than before. Dad says that the pills just keep him well enough to make it back for his next doctor visit. I don't know about that but i am sure its just part of getting old as grandpa says.
Even with Grandpa's bad back, we had a very good time in Missouri spending time with uncle Don and his wife Beth. I also enjoyed making new friends with people like William and others who went to the carnival almost every day. Williams friends were also nice and I will miss everyone a lot. I think the best part of the week was when Grandpa and i got to throw out the first pitch at a minor league baseball game. I was a little nervous, but grandpa made me feel better by telling me to imagine I was a real pitcher and I got so excited I threw it over the catchers head and it ended up hitting the girl holding the american flag. She tried so hard to move out of the way that she ended up hitting the boy next to her and knocking him over and also dropped the flag. Everyone laughed a lot, but I was very embarrassed and decided to buy the girl a whole bunch of french fries that came in a mini batting helmet. Her name was Jody and she was also 12. I talked with her for a little while but her brother or maybe it was her boyfriend, I don't know, kept staring at me with what Mom would call "an evil eye".
Grandpas pitch bounced 3 times before it made it to the catcher and later complained that his back was hurting. My Dad warned him not to throw, but to let me do it alone, but Grandpa is very stubborn (like all Bigskys) and did it anyways. I said to Grandpa later on that both of us threw badly and he said that at least his made it to the catcher and Dad replied that it only proves that "stubborn and competitive go hand in hand". I guess maybe it wasn't the best part of the trip afterall except that everyone in town now knows me not just for being Jem Bigsky the third, but because i was the kid who hit Jody Scmidt with a baseball and made her drop the flag in the dirt. Afterwards all of Williams friends were laughing and patting me on the back because they don't like Jody very much and said that I shouldn't have bought her french fries. I guess that I am not as used to being mean as they are.
Well, I have so much to write about, but will wait till tomorrow to tell you more about my trip. Sometimes looking at the computer for too long makes my bad eye a little more blurry. I am not sure why that is but maybe I'll ask the eye doctor next time I go there. Todays word is from something that was said to me after my throw at the baseball game. A man behind the dugout yelled "lay off the steroids, kid" and then all his friends laughed loudly. So, todays word is "steroids" and it means "highly exaggerated, enhanced, or accelerated version of something". It refers to being "on steroids". I have heard it used many times, but never referring to me. Another definition in the dictionary is very long and talks about molecules and atoms, but it dosn't help me much. I will have to ask my Cousin Bruce what it is exactly because he is a yoga instructor and knows a lot about the human body, but I am not exactly sure what yoga is either.

2005-08-16T13:16:00.000-07:00

Hello this is Cousin Bruce. The 3 Jems are currently on their way back from Missouri as of this morning and Jem III wanted me to send you all a note saying that he will be back on Thursday night. He didn't want everyone to forget about him and he cannot wait to tell everyone about his time in the "Show-me state". Unfortunately, Jem's Grandpa has had back troubles that have prevented them from leaving earlier, but he has been cleared by the doctor to travel again.
Jem also wanted me to thank Amy for her comments.

In case you haven't read the Introduction to Jem's blog....

Howdy!
Welcome to the "Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch" blog site. This site is devoted to ancestral and anecdotal stories of the Bigsky family as told by Jem Bigsky III. The Bigsky family lives and works in California and has, ever since Jerry Buckheister moved there in 1948 and became the legendary silverscreen singing cowboy, Jem Bigsky.
The stories are collected and retold to you by one imaginative and inquisitive 12 year-old boy, who is fondly referred to by his loved ones as, "The Boy", especially by his father, Jem Bigsky II. Look for his weekly entries here as well as the occasional photo of the family.

2005-08-11T15:47:00.000-07:00

Hello from Missouri!
I met a friend named William who has a computer that he said I could use to post a message to my site. It has been a great trip so far to Grandpa's hometown and a lot of fun talking to people here. Some I remember from last year and some I didn't know yet. William is 14 and going to be starting high school. He spends a lot of time at a store in the mall that sells video games and he knows a lot about them. His favorite game is Star Wars and he just bought the Fantastic 4. He spends a lot of time playing them and talking to people on the computer. He told me about many great places to meet people on the internet from all over the world. He was talking with a girl from england for 3 hours yesterday and she really likes video games too. William says they can even play the some games together on the computer. I could not believe this, but he showed me and there was her screen name as player 2. I also learned that no one uses their own name on the computer but a made up one like Williams which is "Space Monkey 4". I thought that was cool because I like space, but I wondered why it was number 4 and William said that there are 3 others with the same name. "Wow, that is amazing" I said and wondered what my name would be if I could think of one. I asked my Dad what he thought and he said that "your name is already made up by your Grandfather". I said maybe my screen name should be "Buckheister" and he laughed.
I will tell everyone all about my time in Missouri when I get back. We are leaving on Saturday and won't be back until next week. I don't have a word for today because I don't have my dictionary, but am learning all about the shortening of words that people use on the internet like lol and btw which means "laugh out loud" and "by the way". Uncle Don says that they are called "abbreviations" and are there to save time. I told him that I know about them but that there are some on the internet that I had never seen before. Uncle Don says that computers are changing everything and that his way of talking and working will be obsolete in 10 years. I asked what obsolete meant and he just said "old and no longer useful". I told him that he should get a computer and he said something I didn't quite understand, "we are nothing but computers".

2005-08-03T19:25:00.000-07:00

I finally remembered to get the photo of Grandpa Jem when he was a young man and am posting it today in honor of his carnival. We leave tomorrow for Missouri and his hometown. We are driving there in Dad's chevy blazer and will get there on sunday dad says. The carnival starts saturday and ends a week after sunday. Grandpa says that this may be the last time he goes so he wants to stay the whole time and see all his old friends that "can still remember who the heck I am". I said that last year a lot of people remembered him and he said that hopefully he'll remember them. I laughed, but was a little embarrassed that I was laughing. He said that its ok because losing your memory isn't all bad. I was kind of surprised about this but didn't ask why. Maybe someday I will know what he's talking about.
I am bringing my writing journal and will write all about our trip so that I can post it when I get home. Although when I asked Dad if Uncle Don has a computer at his house, he said "I am not even sure he has a microwave yet". Uncle Don is kind of old-fashioned but Dad says he is a very honest man and a very good accountant. Cousin Bruce, Uncle Don's son, says that his Dad "squeezes the nickel so hard the buffalo poops". I looked and there is no buffalo on the nickel. He also says that he is also stubborn, "like all Buckheisters". That is today's word, "stubborn". It means "having or showing dogged determination not to change one's attitude or position on something, esp. in spite of good arguments or reasons to do so". A use of it is "he was stubborn in his refusal to eat vegetables". Now I know what cousin Bruce means.
I have to go pack my clothes before Mom gets a hold of them and makes me bring clothes that I don't like. By the way, the horse in the picture is Hank and not Ferdinand. Hank was Grandpa's favorite.

2005-07-30T20:25:00.000-07:00

On Friday my school had a picnic at the county park. There was hot dogs and watermelon and my teacher asked if i had a "hollow leg" because i ate so much. I said no but i love watermelon and hot dogs.
The person I like the least at school is George Davison, Randys older bother. He always makes fun of me and calls me "Big-skeee". I always tell him that it is pronounced "Big-Sky" and he asks if I am "indian or something?". I said I don't think so, but my Grandpa Jem played one in an episode of the "Lone Ranger" once. Actually, it was his first ever acting job and he didn't get to say anything except "hey-yah, hey-yah". I asked Grandpa if we were part indian and he said that a great-great Grandfather on my Mothers side was a Sioux indian. "That makes you 1/16 or something, but it doesn't make me anything but old!". Grandpa Jem was in 23 movies and 3 tv shows before he retired from show business in 1973. He said that westerns became about violence and "shooting anything that moves" and there was no place for a "polyester-wearing cowboy who sings about the mountain air and pretty girls". I said that I like his songs a lot and he just grinned and said "singing is what made me feel alive". He then told me a story about the horse that would not let him get on unless he sang to it while he saddled up. He said sometimes he'd have to sing to it while he rode too or the horse would get ornery. I guess that is the word for today. It means "bad-tempered and combative; stubborn" and its usage is "some hogs are just mean and ornery". I guess some horses are too.
By the way, the horses name was Ferdinand.

2005-07-28T21:20:00.000-07:00

The town where Grandpa Jem grew up is in Missouri and every year they have a special festival for him called Jem Bigsky carnival days. Usually he goes there for those days except last year when he was sick, so me and Dad went instead. Many people in the town had never met my Grandpa, but they still celebrated him, at least I think they were celebrating him, they were celebrating something. We did talk to some of the people who know him and they said some very nice things, but I did hear Some people who said they don't like my Grandpa or my family because we all left there (except my Uncle Don and his family) and they think that Grandpa was a good man until he "went to Hollywood". They also said that Grandpa isn't a "Buckheister", but a "Bigsky" who left his hometown for "better people". I don't know what that person meant, but I think the people in Grandpa's hometown seemed very nice. Dad says they are jealous. I guess that is todays word, Jealous. I kind of know what that word means, but I'll look it up anyways. It means "wanting something that belongs to another and to which one has no particular right or claim" An example of its usage, "it is hard not to be jealous of a man with a job like his". I guess some people are "jealous" of my Grandfather, but then maybe if someone saw him when he has back pain and is laying on the floor while swearing at my dad, maybe they wouldn't be. Or if they saw my Grandfather on the day my Grandma died, then maybe they woudn't as well. I guess nobody knows exactly what its like to be another person even though they think that they know what it is like.
Well, on the happy side, tomorrow is my last day of school for the summer. I will not have to go back until September. My school is different than most schools since we go to school into the summer, but its great because we get out of school for a month at christmas time and for 3 weeks around easter time. My friend Tom from church goes to school in town and has been on vacation since June! He will be going to my school this year and I am glad that I will see him everyday. I like school most of the time, but since I won't have to go back for awhile, I get to go to Grandpa's carnival again this year. Me, My Dad, and my Grandfather leave next week and even though some people don't like our family in Missouri, most people like him and since Grandpa didn't go last year, my Dad says it should be very good this year.
I asked Cousin Bruce if he was going and he said that he goes there every year for christmas and "once a year is enough".

2005-07-26T20:11:00.000-07:00

Jem Bigsky II, My Dad. Today after school he took me fishing down at Coopers pond. I caught 2 blue gills and a very small bass (6 inches). Dad says we shouldn't keep him because his dad might miss him. That made me feel bad for catching him in the first place, but Dad said that "he will grow 2 inches just from the experience alone". I asked how many inches i'll grow because i caught him and Dad just laughed. I said "no really" and again he laughed, but after he stopped he said "not enough to reach the gas pedal of the tractor". I said that i will soon because next year i'll be in puberty and that made the root beer almost shoot out his nose. "Don't do that while I'm drinking". I said I was sorry. He winked and gave me a pat on the head. It was a good day.

Someday i'll try to remember my Dads life story before he married my Mom and had me, but for now I can only think of fishing and that root beer.
I did find a kind of recent picture of him and Mom at the policemans ball. When I told Dad that I was going to put the picture on the internet for the whole world to see, he said "good. now everyone will know where you get your good looks from". I had to think about that one.
I forgot to do a word today. whoops...Maybe 2 from last time makes it even. See ya later.
Jem III

2005-07-24T23:14:00.000-07:00

I am supposed to be sleeping because I have school tomorrow, but i wanted to tell everyone about my trip up north. Me and my Dad and Grandpa sold a horse and had to deliver it to some nice people in Redbluff. It was a long trip, but we got to stay in a hotel last night. It was fun and I got to watch a movie called "Men in Black" in the hotel room. Grandpa says movies have changed since he was in them many years ago. I asked how and he said aliens didn't talk to people and you could see the strings attached to the spaceship. "People were supposed to be scared and it wasn't funny" he said. Grandpa used to be in movies in the 50's and 60's and all of them were about cowboys and indians. I asked if any of them were funny (I've only watched 5 or 6 and none of them were funny) and Grandpa said that some were funny but none were supposed to be funny except one. That one was called "Rancho Diablo"...The Devil's Ranch (I looked it up in my Spanish book). I asked if I could see that one and he said only when your 17. I asked why and he said "ask your know-it-all cousin". oh well.
Oh almost forgot about todays word; puberty. It means "period during which adolescents reach sexual maturity". An example of its use is "parents often forget how difficult going through puberty can be". I now must look up adolescent, so that makes 2 words for today. It means "a young person in the process of developing from a child into an adult; teenager". Oh that is me next year. I will be 13 on December 1st. Now I just have one more question, what does sexual maturity mean. I think this could go on all night! I guess it must have something to do with sex, but I am not supposed to say that word. but no one said not to type it.
Sex

2005-07-21T22:35:00.000-07:00

Cousin Bruce says I need to use spell check before i put this on the internet "so people can friggin read it for pete's sake". I guess my spelling will get much better that way. Cousin Bruve also gave me a dictionary to look up new words because he says all great writers need to know lots of long words. My new word of the day is 'exaggerate'...."To overstate". An example of its use is: "the conflict was exaggerated by the media". Oh its like lying, sort of. Well i'll be sure not to exaggerate when i tell my stories.
I guess I should tell why my blog is called "stories from lazy eye ranch". Grandpa Jem called our ranch that in 1952 because my family has a "optical condition" called "lazy eye" where one of our eyes is a little droopyer than the other and that eye doesn't see as well as the other (spellcheck must not know the word droopy but it rhymes with snoopy). Some of us in our family have it worse than others. Grandpa Jem has it bad and has trouble driving his chevy at night. Dad won't let him drive at night anymore after he ran over our mailbox. My droopy eye is not too bad and gets a little better because Mom puts drops in it. I guess the doctor says that glasses won't help me any, but that the drops should make it ok until I get to puberty. I asked Cousin Bruce what puberty is and he pointed at the dictionary. I guess that will be tomorrows word. Cousin Bruce is going back to Santa Barbra tomorrow morning so i guess i am on my own with the computer and my blog. He says i can email him if i have any questions. I said i'll email him asking about tomorrows word and he had what Mom calls a "belly laugh". oh! i forgot to tell you how big the ranch is and how many horses and dogs we have. Oh well i guess i will save that for another day.
goodnight,
The boy

2005-07-20T23:18:00.000-07:00

wow my first entry! This is a picture of me at 7 years old. I really like it because it is the only picture of my favarite shirt I could find. It didntt fit me anymore and then mom gave it to the church. Now I see it on Randy Davison sometimes on sundays. He doesnt know it was my shirt and probibly wishes id stop starring at him.
Cousin Bruce helped me start this blog and im really happy because now i can tell all the great stories my family tells me and i can practice writing and using my new computer. I said that grandpa Jem should do a blog too but dad says that 'he doesnt even know how to change the clock in his chevy'. So i guess i will write again tomorow if i can remember how to work everething.
adeos (i'm learning spanish at school)

2005-07-20T22:02:00.000-07:00

Howdy!
Welcome to the "Stories from Lazy Eye Ranch" blog site. This site is devoted to ancestral and anecdotal stories of the Bigsky family as told by Jem Bigsky III. The Bigsky family lives and works in California and has, ever since Jerry Buckheister moved there in 1948 and became the legendary silverscreen singing cowboy, Jem Bigsky.
The stories are collected and retold to you by one imaginative and inquisitive 12 year-old boy, who is fondly referred to by his loved ones as, "The Boy", especially by his father, Jem Bigsky II. Look for his weekly entries here as well as the occasional photo of the family.